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I’m madder than an Eskimo with a busted mukluk! Sarah Palin resigned as governor of Alaska on Friday, and I still can’t get over it. I can’t believe her red high heels won’t be clicking across our national stage anymore.

I’ll never see the light flicker off her glasses again, or hear her chirpy voice, or watch her bouncy hair blow in the wind like she was the smart Charlie’s Angel.

So let me get this straight: Sarah Palin resigned but Mark Sanford is staying put, Al Franken is Senator and Jesse Jackson’s still not in jail?

It’s all a mystery to me, but you know women: who can understand what they do, anyhow? Not even THEY know!

Maybe it was just that time of the month, and Sarah will change her mind!

I doubt it, though. When she quit, some turd at the Gas Huffing Post made jokes about her baby. Sarah just got tired of being made fun of, I guess. Although I don’t get why that husband of hers doesn’t just beat these idiots up!

This old man’s heart is broken in a million pieces, just like our economy, and no stimulus package will ever put it together again. The only bailout that will save me is a big bucket of Barracuda!

I don’t know how I’ll get by now. I always had Sarah Palin to pin my hopes on. Now that she’s gone, we’re stuck with Newt, Huckleberry and that little foreign fella from Louisiana who looks like E.T. in a suit.

Now who will save us from the Teleprompter Kid, the Hair Club for Men Vice President, and the other crooks and crazies?

Goodbye Sarah Palin! Visit us at Rancho Angerarro any time you need a break from the snow.