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ED ANGER: “TIGER FOR PRESIDENT!”


If those Norway guys can get so fed up with the Communist-in-Chief that they replace him with a cardboard cutout… I don’t see why we can’t just kick out the Teleprompter Kid and make Tiger Woods president instead.

Here me out: first, they kind of look alike, so nobody would notice.

Also, with Tiger Woods, we already know he’s a creep, so we don’t have any of those Bill Clinton surprises. This saves lots of time and money on investigations and whatnot. Comedians and talk show guys could just recycle all their old Clinton jokes. The t-shirt and bumpersticker industry would really take off, and that would help the economy.

Of course, we’ll have to hire extra Secret Service to protect Tiger from his wife and her golf club, but that’ll work out to peanuts. And instead of a Vice President, he could just have a caddy.

Plus Tiger Woods is gonna need a job now that all his fancy sponsor are gonna bail on them. He’ll still get to live in a big fancy house, with the added bonus that now someone else will be able to drive him around.

He can still practice golf in the Rose Garden, too.

Tiger Woods isn’t qualified to be President or win a Nobel Prize, but then again, neither is Obama. How hard can it be to read a Teleprompter? And I bet Tiger Woods has a real birth certificate and everything. And he wins prizes for doing real things!

Meanwhile Obama can go back to getting old terrorists to write his books and giving “Chinese food” speeches – you know, the ones you can’t remember an hour later?

Who’s with me, America? Could making Tiger Woods President possibly make things worse? And if that doesn’t work, we can always get O.J.!