WASHINGTON, DC – Fathers all over the nation are uniting under the slogan “I drive better when I’ve had a few.”

Spokesmen for the newly formed association have announced that FAMADD will focus its energies on “actively and proactively fostering father-first policies and attitudes concerning how many beers we can have before we ride home.”

The group—which has not released its membership data, but is rumored to be numbered in the tens of thousands—advocates that mothers “mind their own damn business and let a man shake it off.”

FAMADD’s inception has ignited a storm of controversy in the anti-drug lobbying world, not least in the halls of MADD, which perceives itself as being directly targeted.

“This is just typical,” a company spokeswoman said in a statement.  “Won’t listen to a shred of advice, even if it’s good advice.  And we end up having to pay for it when we get lost on the way home and they won’t call a cab or ask for directions.”

“They can be so pigheaded sometimes,” she added.

Pigheaded or no, the leadership of FAMADD insists that they’re in the right on this issue.  “What we’re trying to do here is come together and convey the message that, listen, we’re grown men.  We work hard all day.  We pay the bills.  And it’s our goddamn car.  So if we want to drive with a few beers in our bellies that’s our own damn business.”

The new advocacy group is presently running an ad campaign featuring the brand message “Friends don’t let friends drive drunk, but sons, daughters and wives damn well better.”

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  1. wow i didnt realize there were still people this ignorant not sedated in a facility. i agree, wait until that arrogance costs the life of someone YOU may love – i don't know though this is pretty deep ingrained ignorance, you may not get it then. unfortunately we will have to wait unti YOU are responsible for taking the life of someone that is loved by others and then hopefully we will get to see you jailed – with prisoners who aren't on your side of flagrant disregard for life.

  2. How many Females do you see on the DUI commercials?

    If wives can't keep their drunks home, it's their problem not the Governments to enforce! Most of madd is probably on social assistance and needs to find a job other than writting their representatives!

  3. Ok morons….You drunks (not quite men) killed my dad! Same drunk man killed 2 other people. My sister,My Mom was in the hospital for a year, my best friend and my cousins legs were ripped off by a drunk retired Army officer. Besides losing his whole leg and more the gov. had to pay millions for the Dr. bills and damages because he could never work again. I have no Dad or college fund thanks to infrahumans like you drunks! Drink all you want at home ,walk or take a cab. You drunk drivers are playing Russian roulette with others lives because you are TOO WEAK to control yourselves!

  4. Those people that have killed people driving drunk are way over the legal limit at least 3 times. The legal limit used to be .18 because of scientific studies stated that is the threshold of being impaired to drive but MADD wanted more people to go to jail and mess their records up by wanting to bring that down to .08. There has never been a death caused by someone on that alcohol level.

  5. Thank you, I couldn’t agree more, its .05 here in Colorado which is beyond bs, to make it even worse its actually zero tolerance, my last dwai because I simply didn’t comply with the Rangers point of view, anyways, Maybe if youre like a 50lb bulimic retarded part of the madd blonde dike, .08 might get that thing drunk, bun not really any one else.


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