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AXL ROSE ROBBED

PARIS —  Guns N’ Roses front man Axl Rose was robbed of three gold-and-diamond necklaces and the remainder of his talent.
The necklaces were worth some $200,000, his talent was estimated to be worth $5 million.
It happened after a concert in Paris.  Rumors are circulating that Guns N’ Roses former guitarist, Slash, was in the area at the time.   But Slash told WWN, “Why would I steal his necklaces?  And his talent… that was gone long ago.”

A Paris police spokesman said Wednesday that the lead singer of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame-inducted band was fuming after the theft during a private gathering after the band’s show at Bercy stadium the previous night.
Axl thew a tantrum and caused over $500,000 worth of damage – according to unconfirmed sources.  “He was a big baby about it,” said one Paris fan.  “He was cursing out everybody and just started punching the walls and throwing brie everywhere.”
Axl and his crew have had a rough couple of weeks on their overseas tour. Some of the tour low-lights include Axl injuring his leg and then falling off stage just days later.  He also forget the lyrics to “Welcome to the Jungle” and kept singing “Welcome to the Jingle.”

He was also upset that he did not have enough groupies backed stage in Paris and intended to sue the concert promoters for not providing him enough of them.
Fans have been walking out of his shows due to their usual late start times and the band was even pelted with stale baguettes during their Paris show.

Axl is heading to his next show in Moenchengladbach, Germany.  Already fans are lining up, getting ready to jack Axl again.
His concert tour ends in Israel, where Axl hopes to sing at the wailing wall.

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3 thoughts on “AXL ROSE ROBBED”

  1. I admit it, I stole his talent. I'm using his talent to knit mittens for frogs.. my frog mittins have never been so good. He cannot have this talent back. Honestly I stole it just before the spaghetti incident album

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