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WINTER STORM 2009


DETROIT, MI – Winter has finally arrived in a series of storms pelting the Midwest.  Bat Boy has instigated a statewide day of revelry in Michigan.

Major storm patterns are sweeping across the US, bringing cold temperatures and rain or snow.  Eastern states are being pelted with rain and hail and experiencing the first wintery temperatures of the season.  Midwestern states have been hit the hardest, being blanketed with snow earlier this week.  Yesterday the entire state of Michigan enjoyed an unofficial Snow Day thanks to America’s favorite mutant, Bat Boy.

Reports first came in early yesterday of a strange shirtless boy playing in the middle of a major intersection in downtown Detroit.  Residents were complaining that the child was hitting people with snowballs on their way to work.  By the time police arrived on the scene several passers by had joined the youth in a snowball fight, hiding behind the various snow drifts and immobile cars.  Since no one appeared to be complaining the police simply watched the child with large eyes attract more and more office workers to play in the snow.

No one is sure what Bat Boy was doing in Michigan.  Most likely a series of detours led him there after his recent trip to Los Angeles.  However he got there, the young mutant appeared to be unaffected by the severe cold despite wearing no shirt and cutoff shorts.  Police pulled him away from the snowball fight and only let him return once he had begrudgingly put on a snowsuit a local store owner donated for the child.  Bat Boy sulked for exactly 45 seconds, then returned to the fun.

As the day progressed more and more people were encouraged to come out and enjoy the weather.  People from all walks of life were inspired and encouraged by Bat Boy, who speaks only in squeaks, to drop what they were doing and come out and play.  Bankers joined receptionists in snowball fights,  legal clerks made snowmen with admins, as hundreds joined the seasonal merriment.  Eventually the streets of downtown Detroit were filled with people playing in the snow.

Word spread and soon pockets of winter fun began popping up in the outlying metro Detroit areas.  Eventually the word of the incident spread across the state until lawmakers in Lansing declared a statewide Snow Day.

Bat Boy was last seen taking an impromptu sled to the top of a 3 story snowdrift that had accumulated against the local headquarters for Verizon Wireless.  Inertia from the ride is expected to have taken him halfway to Ann Arbor.