I’m madder than a bag lady with a busted shopping cart!

Yesterday I saw a picture in the paper I couldn’t believe. It showed a crazy looking lady with what looked like a mop on her head, wearing a green garbage bag – and holding up a cell phone!

The paper said lots of homeless people have cell phones now – and sometimes the government pays for them! Which means you and I pay for them, my fellow red, white and blue blooded Americans! I don’t have a cell phone, but I’m paying for some crazy lady’s!

And when these homeless get some radar laser beam brain cancer years from now from holding that thing up to their ears all day, guess who has to pay for that, too?

Did you see how Obama’s wife went to a soup kitchen, and half the ‘poor’ people took out cell phones and took her picture?!

Who the heck are they talking to with these cell phones anyhow? The voices in their heads? Their fifty cats?

Back in my day, we didn’t have homeless people. We had hobos, winos and bums! They road across the country on trains to spread out their stinkiness, instead of the way they do today, sitting on the same street corner for years and smelling up the place.

And our homeless people sure didn’t have free phones. Being poor meant something different too; today it means you’ve only got a 24” TV instead of a 42”, and an old car instead of a new one, and you’re fat instead of skinny!

When even bums have fancy phones, that means either the country’s in great shape or going down the toilet!


  1. being homeless does not mean a person is crazy or a bum. no wonder our country had stalled and plummeted under the last administration. this kind of rhetoric is what they would put into people heads to move their fat cat agendas. i am so glad the majority of americans are better than this.

    btw…it's President Obama and First Lady Michelle Obama, not Obama and his wife.


    • In actual fact, most homeless are either mentally ill, or bums. The number of people who are homeless due to job loss, etc. is miniscule.

      Also, there is nothing wrong with saying 'Obama and his wife.' Nobody ever worried about calling the last president and his wife 'President Bush and First Lady Laura Bush.' Works both ways.

  2. Once again you have "nailed it". I often get approached by "homeless" but most of them have nicer friggin shoes than I do. How can can give a buck to some dude wearing $90 basketball shoes. You see these guys sitting on the curb playing Handel's "Messiah" on a 3 string guitar, but they can't wash their friggin hair and say " ..that will be $4.50..please pull up to the second window.'?
    To me, if you are truly poor and homeless..you better weigh about 47 pounds and have flies buzzing around your head. Don't come rolling up on me looking like Nell Carter asking for food…..

  3. The way this was presented was completely tasteless, but the man does have a point. As well as a few of the other commenters. Don't ask me for anything when you dress a heck of a lot better than I do…………

  4. If you can afford a cell phone, you can afford to get off your tush and get a job. I agree 100%, if they won't work, take their phones away.


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