MIAMI – Dwarf-Tossing Season got off to a BIG start in bars across Miami.
Florida is the first state in the union to sanction the unique sport of dwarf tossing. It’s a sport and an art that involves two athletes – one of whom is a dwarf.
Some of top dwarf tossers in the world have descended, once again, on Florida for the annual Snow White Cup.
Most states outlawed the sport in 1989, when national controversy over dwarf tossing prompted state legislatures to ban it in bars for safety reasons.
Florida authorities have deemed it to be a safe sport now – and it is heavily regulated. “We try to keep dwarf injuries to a minimum,” said Dwarf Tossing Association president, Tom Hillstrom.
“Football is far more dangerous than dwarf tossing,” said Hillstrom. “DT is an entertaining and competitive sport that features highly skilled athletes.”
The Little People of America have filed a few lawsuits, but Florida officials dismiss them. “The Little People have a tiny case,” said Florida attorney general, Pam Ziondi. “I think the judge will toss out the case – and a few dwarfs.”
There are 50 top dwarf tossers in the world and they have all gathered in Miami for the season opener. Chris Blanton of Kansas City, MO is the reigning dwarf tossing champion. He once tossed a dwarf fifty-seven yards in nightclub in Melbourne, Australia.
Blanton has worked with top dwarf, Jimmy Cobbs of Newark, New Jersey for the last five years. “They are a dynamite team,” said Hillstrom. “Cobbs is a maniac and Blanton tosses the hell out of him.”
Governor Chris Christie of New Jersey is thinking of allowing Dwarf Tossing in his state.
Let’s the dwarf tossing begin!!
5 thoughts on “DWARF-TOSSING SEASON OPENS IN FLORIDA!”
I urge the Bar Association of Florida to consider the utter lack of professional conduct by Ms Biondi for her public disdain of a minority group.
I was the Road Manager for the Australian Dwarf Tossing out of FL in the 1980's. Ttalking with our 'Stars' of the show. One was a professional wrestler, he said being tossed, for the money he was paid, was much easier. The guys safety was our main concern. They landed on many air mattress wearing elbow and knee pads, also mouth guards. If a thrower didn't appear strong enough for the throw, they were told to set him down and thank you for the effort. They were not allowed to throw. I did all the driving, checking in the hotels and bars, setting up the mattresses, making sure our talent was good. So when the show time came all they had to do was show up.
I went through this disdain and uproar before, I hope not again.
YES LET THE DWARF TOSSING GAMES BEGIN!!! (yes thats an attempt at a Caesar impersonation)
I used be tossed around, but i took an arrow to the knee
FIFTY-SEVEN YARDS??????? BULL—T !!!Nobody can even throw a 16 pound shotput that far!!!!