ALBANY, NY – New York Governor David Paterson is introducing legislation today which would promote same-sex marriages in the state. Political insiders believe he is being pressured to do so by the Gay Mafia, based out of New York’s Fashion District.

The Gay Mafia, or the Velvet Hand, has been a force in New York politics since the 1970’s.  Originally founded in the back rooms of Studio 54, they are now the “Pink Power Brokers” who run New York’s Fashion and Theater districts.  Current alleged fairy godfather Harvey Fierstein was unavailable for comment.

The Governor said in a statement yesterday, flanked by two new and impeccably dressed bodyguards, that “the timing was always right for this.  And a-all that was required was, the-the will.”  His hands began to shake and before he could say more his bodyguards, one of whom appeared to be a season 1 contestant on “Make Me a SuperModel”, escorted him from the platform and into a waiting limo with the license plate “Qu33n B.”

The FBI is currently investigating New York’s Gay Mafia.  The Velvet Hand has been tied to fake purse trafficking, drug running, and every Broadway musical for the past fifteen years.  They are believed to have a stranglehold on the body waxing industry, and own several gay steel mills upstate as fronts.  Their army of chorus dancer enforcers has ensured their underground power for decades.

The Velvet Hand is also believed to be tied to a series of murders; at each one. a single rose tied with a pink chiffon ribbon was left as a calling card.

Governor Paterson will officially propose the legislation later this afternoon.

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  1. Sir Governor Paterson: Q: Do you know what are you doing? There is a God who created us in marriage between a man and a women. The Bible says first of all in Genisis; chapter 6 what happens to people when wickedness is increasing. It also was said in the New Testament where Paul was inspired by the Holy Spirit to write in Romans Chapter 1. God loves all His people but He doesn't love the sin which would destroy them. Please consider Gov. Paterson of what you're about to do. How can we be blessed in America when we come against God. Look what happen to the place called Sodom and Gomorah, it got burned down to the ground.

    • 1. Same sex attraction/interaction has been around since the Bible.
      2. If God created man and woman then he is responsible for their sexual orientation.
      3. People do what makes them happy. If it isn't your life its not your business.

  2. tatjana you owe a 1.2 million dollar judgement what are you doing even commenting on this you have no right. pay the judgement you crook


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