WEEKLY WORLD NEWS WAS ON THE SCENE TO REPORT ON THE FIRST-EVER WEDDING BETWEEN A HUMAN BRIDE AND A ZOMBIE GROOM!
DAMASCUS, VA – Ashley Morgan (a human) decided to go ahead with her wedding to Zack Porter (a zombie!) last month. WWN was invited to the wedding and it turned out to be one of the wildest events WWN has EVER covered.
The Zombie Apocalypse came to this small southern Virginia town in 2020. Some residents escaped the zombie horde but many weren’t so lucky. Now that things have subsided a bit, the zombies are actually trying to live peacefully with the humans. It’s not so easy to do because not only do the humans fear the zombies – but the zombies are afraid of the “overly aggressive” humans. It’s not clear who acts worse!
Ashley made it through the apocalypse (so far), by proving to be good at shooting, running, and hiding but Zack… well he stayed back to give Ashley a head start and he was bitten. Now, and forever, Zack is a zombie. But there’s something a little bit different about Zombie Zack. He seems to have kept his humanity, his heart, and soul and has retained his deep love for Ashley.
Despite the protestation of her southern Baptist family, Ashley decided to go ahead with her wedding. “I love Zack, no matter what he is! He’ll always be the love of my life.”
Thinking only of her well-being, Zack told Ashley to move on, to forget about him, and move far away to a place that is not “infested” with zombies. He wanted to save her, the woman of his dreams. He was willing to give up his happiness for her. But Ashley wouldn’t think of leaving his side. She doesn’t care what he looks like, or what he eats, she doesn’t care if he’s alive or… dead, she wants to be with him for the rest of her life and the rest of his death.
It’s truly one of the most beautiful love stories we have ever heard.
So the wedding went as originally planned, at a VFW Hall in Damascus. Up until the moment she walked down the aisle, her family tried to talk her out of it (are you insane!), but she wouldn’t listen. She knows she can make it work. She WILL make it work. And so Ashley got to have the wedding of her not-in-her-wildest dreams. She had herself a true Zombie Wedding!
And WWN was there to report on. The events were so wild, so incredible that there is a film being made about his incredible wedding. Two of our reporters were on the scene. Did they make it out alive? Well, I’m writing this story and I wasn’t there. So, what do you think?
Weekly World News will keep revealing details of this Zombie Wedding. You will not believe how it all turned out!
4 thoughts on “THE ZOMBIE WEDDING!”
This reminds me of Limony Snickett and a “Series of Unfortunate Events”
and Dustin Hoffman’s drama critic character saying, “She does deserve him”…(sniff, sniff) 🤣
I think Zack is a cousin of mine! If I’m right, his real name is Doug Noland and he is a KNOWN polygamist!!!