RICK SANCHEZ TO FIGHT JON STEWART IN VEGAS

LAS VEGAS –  Rick Sanchez, just fired from CNN, has challenged Jon Stewart to a boxing match.  Stewart has accepted.
Rick Sanchez will fight Jon Stewart at The Mandalay Bay Center in Las Vegas on December 11th, 2010.  Don King will be promoting the bout.  “Only in America,”  said King.
The other day Rick Sanchez’ made a regrettable and hurtful statement about Jews, which helped get him fired from CNN.   Rick Sanchez said this:

I’m telling you that everyone who runs CNN is a lot like Stewart, and a lot of people who run all the other networks are a lot like Stewart, and to imply that somehow they, the people in this country who are Jewish, are an oppressed minority?….Yeah

He also said, Jon Stewart is a bigot.  Sanchez had made occasional gaffes over recent months, for which Jon Stewart mocked him mercilessly, including calling the anchor “a total meathead.”

King and his fight promoters are officially billing the bout as:   The Bigot vs.  The Meathead.  Others are simply calling it The Rumble in Jewbana!  Tickets go on sale Tuesday, October 12th.
Stewart, who is about six inches shorter than Sanchez and weighs about forty pounds less, feels that he can knock him out in the first or second round.  “The guy is so dumb, all I have to do is say ‘look behind you’ and the meathead will turn around.  That’s when I’ll wallop him in the face.  He’ll fold like a bad taco.”
Stewart, who was born in New York City, but raised in New Jersey feels that he his Jewish heritage will be a plus in the boxing ring.  “I’m gonna rub lox all over my body before the match.  That’ll keep him away.”
Sanchez was born in Cuba, but grew up in Florida.  He thinks that the fight will “take me about 20 seconds.  All I have to do is smack the yarmulke off his head. When he goes to pick it up, I’ll wallop him in the face.  He’ll drop like a matzoh ball.”
Stephen Colbert, wanting to get in on the “action,” made a request to fight Anderson Cooper in an opening welterweight fight that night.  Cooper, who lifts weights regularly so “I look can good to the guys in the gym”, doesn’t want to fight Colbert.  Instead, he’d like to smack around Aziz Ansari – “he’s a good-looking Indian man.”   Ansari has accepted and is already drinking maple syrup in order to gain weight so he take on the slightly bulkier Cooper.
Fight odds have Stewart a 3-1 favorite.   The odds that Sanchez says something stupid that night are even money.
Place your bets!

11 thoughts on “RICK SANCHEZ TO FIGHT JON STEWART IN VEGAS”

  1. I can't believe people believe the crap they put on here! California being sold to China. Yeah, right! And now this! I can just see Jon Stewart in his boxing shorts dancing around like Mohammed Ali! Yeah, right!

    Reply
  2. Jewish people are, pound for pound, the most well off people in the United States. A great percentage are college educated and have professional occupations. They are incredibly disproportionately represented in government and the media. what's the freaking big whoop? Everybody knows this. At worst, these simple facts tend to suggest high achievement and perhaps a bit of nepotism, not too bad really. But, when you fire someone for pointing it out it looks EVIL and oppressive.

    Reply
    • Sanchez just looked bad because he called Jon a bigot, with absolutely no reasoning behind it. He then said that Jews are not oppressed (they may make lots of $ in US, but they're still victims of LOTS of prejudice and hatred, and historically are probably the most oppressed peoples in the world-maybe tied with blacks) He then said that Jews run the media. There are lots of jews who work in the media, but to say that the jews are running the show is just kind of a bigoted thing to say, it implies that the jews are all working together against everyone else, which is stupid, and what many kkk or neonazi types love to tout. That's why sanchez got fired.

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