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TAYLOR SWIFT – VALENTINE’S DAY ADVICE

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Taylor Swift knows a lot about heartbreak and… love.  WWN has assembled a Valentine’s tip sheet for lovers, based on her amazing life of love and song.

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Based on her song lyrics, interviews and overall behavior with men (and boys), here is some hand Valentine’s Day advice for girls based on the life of  the legend – Taylor Swift.

1) YOU ARE NUMBER ONE.   Yes, it’s Valentine’s Day and you have to get your man something, or at least a card… but remember that YOU are the most important person in the world.  Forget about what he wants, and focus on what he should be getting you.  Chocolates and flowers are… BOR-ING and lame.  Expect more… demand more.  He will always be #2, but he should be okay with that because you are always, and forever, number one.

2)  DUMP HIM.  If he doesn’t give you what you want and deserve on Valentine’s Day, then dump him… telling him… “we are never, ever, getting back together.”   If he is not EVERYTHING that you ever wanted in a guy, and he does not live up to ALL your expectations, then dump him.  Another young stud will come along and want you.  Guaranteed.

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3) DON’T CRY.  Even if you are happy and even if he asks you to marry him on Valentine’s Day.  You want him to know that you are strong and independent and that you don’t need him.  Yes, you want him, but you don’t need him.   You can accept his proposal as long as he understand that you will forever be in charge of your own life.

4)  NO NEED TO IMPRESS HIM.   He either loves you for who you are or he doesn’t.  There’s no need for you to change anything about yourself to please him.  As Taylor said, “One of my goals is always to be who I am, no matter what, all the time.”

5)  DATE A KENNEDY.  If you can find a lover who is somehow related to the Kennedy family – date him!  The Kennedy’s are the most awesome family in the history of the planet and if you can date one, like Taylor did, even for a brief time, your life will be complete.  You have won the love game.

6) WRITE SONGS ABOUT YOUR GUY.  Taylor Swift is famous for this.  Some even say that she dates guys ONLY so she can get a new song out of it.  But, generally, Taylor feels that if you write a song about a guy, it makes you love him more or hate him less. 

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And here’s her reported, specific, “ideas” for Valentine’s Day for men:

1)  ROSES.  Give eleven red roses and one white rose. Attach a note that reads:  “In every bunch there’s one who stands out and you are that one.”   Better yet, buy your girl three dozen roses – and a new car.

2) KISS HER HAND.   Chivalry should not be dead.  Kiss her hand ever once in a while – with a flourish. And tell her she’s beautiful…

3) LISTEN TO HER SONGS.   If she writes songs, spend Valentine’s Dy listening to her song, memorizing the lyrics and then do your best not to screw up when you sing them back to her at night.   

4) WORSHIP HER.   Bring her into your room and show her the Valentine’s shrine you have made to her.  Then bow down to her.

5) WRITE HER A SONG. There’s no way you could ever write a song as good as her, but you should try.  Write  a love song from the heart – and sing it to her.  If your voice sucks, get a friend to sing it and then lip sync it to her.

6) MAKE HER A MEAL.   Cook her a Valentine’s Meal.  Serve it to her.  And clean up after.   She is your Queen.

7) MAKE LOVE TO HER.   But, it’s Valentine’s Day, so focus on her pleasure and pleasing her.  What you want doesn’t matter today – or any day really.   You exist to please her.

8)  CHAMPAGNE AND CHOCOLATES.   Do not even THINK about buying chocolates at Rite Aide for her.  Buy the MOST expensive chocolate you can find and a bottle of champagne that costs at least $500.  Anything less and you are sending a message to her that you don’t love her.

9)  LET HER TALK TO HER OTHER BOYFRIENDS.  She probably has other guys that want to wish her Valentine’s Day and give her gifts.  Let them.  She’s not your prize only… If you do this, she’ll put you in the number one spot – for a little while.

10)  EXPENSIVE JEWELRY – A MUST.   You will ruin her Valentine’s Day if you do NOT give her expensive jewelry.   What do you need a saving’s account for anyway?

That’s it.   Taylor Swift knows all…

Happy Valentine’s Day!!