“Suddenly, I heard what sounded like a cat caught in a blender. In the midst of all that shrieking, I could’ve sworn I heard my name.”
New cracks have appeared in the 61-year cover-up of a fatal UFO crash in Roswell, New Mexico
And they’re finally ripe for slaughter!
“After spending decades trying to decipher crop circles, we have found they are nothing more than obscenity-laced insults”
Following Sarah Palin’s emergence on the national stage, the blogosphere lit up with reports that Governor Palin does not actually hail from Wasilla, Alaska but from a planet known as Wazeela.
The tiny planet, which is located some 37,000 miles due east from the Sun, is known to be rich with fossil fuels that lie beneath snow-capped peaks.
Internet reports also cited the particularly short 5-month gestation period of Wazeela females as proof that Palin was, in fact, a Palien.
A 54-year-old waitress says a space alien ate two washer loads of clothes right off her line!
Without warning, the UFO Alien arrived in Minnesota today, turning the heads of Republicans and Democrats alike.
Some commentators could not help but notice that the UFO Alien and Cindy McCain possessed similar headshapes.
Many insiders felt that a meeting of the minds between Cindy McCain and the UFO Alien was imminent and could take place prior to her address to the convention.
The Alien’s rebuttal of McCain’s lobbying has left the Republican Party fuming.
Orthodontist Gerald Fixit was sleeping soundly when he was abruptly awakened by a rumbling. “My house started to shake,” said Fixit. “There were intense, bright lights shining into my window, blinding me.