LOS ANGELES, CA – Hollywood’s biggest night was marred by its own vanity when a 32-minute tribute video put most of its celebrity audience to sleep!
SWEARING AT GOD IS GOOD FOR YOUR HEALTH
BALTIMORE, MD – A recently completed study has shown that profanity leveled at deities can extend your lifespan.
LOST CITY OF ATLANTIS FOUND?
CANARY ISLANDS – A perfect rectangle of criss-crossing lines has been found on the ocean floor 620 miles off the coast of West Africa. Is this the lost city of Atlantis?
WHALES TAKE DOWN SOMALI PIRATES
CAIRO—The Egyptian government is calling on the gentle giants of the sea to take out pirate ships, and the whales are getting the job done.
MAN SUES HIMSELF FOR $8 MILLION
NEW YORK, NY – Wall Street executive Robert Rubin has successfully sued himself for $8 million.
MAN CHARGED WITH MURDERING COMPUTER
MUMBAI – In one of the most controversial cases in legal history, a man is being charged with murder for destroying a computer.
OREGON BEER TAX HIKE PROTEST
PORTLAND, OR – After a 1,900% tax hike was proposed to help the state budget, Oregon residents have protested by dumping beer into the Portland harbor.
SPACE AGE FASHION WEEK
NEW YORK, NY – It’s Fashion Week in New York City and some of the world’s greatest designers have descended on Bryant Park to show off their work.
DAYTONA 500 ENDS IN SACRIFICE
DAYTONA, FL – NASCAR’s most iconic race ended with a rain-out yesterday afternoon, despite pit crews making multiple sacrifices to the rain gods.
YOUR JOB SEARCH ENDS HERE!
The Board of Directors appreciates your interest in working at The Harold Bugler and welcomes your applications, but doesn’t read or reply to any of them.