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RED ARCS THREATEN TO DESTROY EUROPE

Glowing red arcs, invisible to the naked eye, may destroy Europe by June, 2013.

Red geomagnetic storms are streams of high-energy, charged particles come rushing from the sun to batter Earth.  They are known as Red Arcs.  And they can be catastrophic.

The Red Arc events are disruptions in the magnetosphere, the part of Earth’s atmosphere dominated by the planet’s magnetic field. These Red Arc storms are giant, bright auroras in Earth’s polar regions.  They are the electrically charged part of Earth’s atmosphere, stretching from about 50 to 370 miles above the Earth.

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The arcs give off a very powerful wavelength of red light, and can cause massive damage to buildings, forests and humans.

Scientists had thought there was too much light pollution over Europe for the red arcs to have any affect. But now, the new Italian Army has confirmed that the Red Arcs have broken through the pollution and will… destroy Europe.

“We think Europe will probably erupt in a gigantic inferno,” said Luigi Castrologica, a Professor at the University of Rome.  “The Red Arcs are focused like a laser beam on Italy, France, Spain, Germany and the southern part of England.  These countries will all be wiped out.”

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The United States said that it would like to send anti-Red Arc missiles to Europe, but because of the sequester, “we just don’t have the money to ship our missiles over there. Sorry,” said Jay Carney, White House spokesperson.

What can Europe do about the coming Red Arc apocalypse?

“Pray. That’s all they can do.  Pray that the Red Arc somehow dissipate before striking Europe.  Otherwise, we are doomed,” said Castrologica.

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3 thoughts on “RED ARCS THREATEN TO DESTROY EUROPE”

  1. Hahahah XD i was laughing through the whole thing.

    First of all, if they are invisible to the naked eye, then why are they "glowing"? änd "red?"
    Second, red wavelenth is the lowest on the energy scale of visible light =] The highest frequency of visible light is ultraviolet, and destructiveness of radiation goes up from there. (x-rays are above ultraviolet) if you are going below red, you are going into the order of microwaves and radio waves, neither of which have the power to destroy Europe (melt a chocolate bar, maybe, but not a continent.)
    Thirdly, high energy particles from the sun are impacting with the atmosphere all the time (and they are most certainly not red). This is what causes the aurora borealis, etc. And I dont see the northern lights melting any part of iceland.
    lolwut? Fourth, too much light pollution to have any effect? what on earth does light pollution do to solar radiation? all that would do is hide it from you, which it cant do anyway, because it is invisible XD
    And by the way, a wavelength cant be "powerful". it is the frequency, which changes the colour of the light, which like i said, cant be red.
    The italian army comment cracked me up by the way. The last war they got into lasted all of six minutes before they ran screaming.
    And… wait, what? missiles? XD anti radiation missiles? XD ahhh, you guys are hilarious. And what do you mean the whitehouse doesnt have the money to ship missiles? they have been doing it every single day for a few years to the middle East.

    Thanks for the laugh guys XD

    ps. the only online evidence of Luigi Castrologica (literally a generic italian name with an italian sounding name, and the suffix- logica, meaning studier of) is on this website, linked to this article.
    pps. if the sun was sending out destructive radiation, it would hit the entire world, not just europe.

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