LOS ANGELES – This gang-riddled city has a new group of toughs to worry about – The Unicycle Gang! This gang might sound ridiculous, but these unicycle-riding punks have been implicated in over 375 muggings. They have been running a vast “protection racket” that has extorted close to $10 million from computer, electronics and phone … READ MORE
DiVA Christian has the biggest butt in the world! OXFORD, MS – Diva Christian can’t imagine anything worse than dieting. Her massive bottom is 5ft 3ins across and weighs a whopping 120 pounds – about the same as Lindsay Lohan holding twenty pounds of coke.Diva loves her butt. She has the World’s Biggest Butt. “I … READ MORE
THE GOVERNMENT FEARS A SECRET ATTACK. CIA spy satellite photos reveal that the Chinese have been secretly digging the world’s largest underground tunnel – to the U.S.! “What has us concerned,” says CIA spokesperson Steven Thorley, “is that Chinese are hiding their true intentions. The Chinese keep reassuring us that they are constructing the tunnel … READ MORE
Trenton, NJ – As women spend more time pursuing careers, many still find motherhood appealing. But pregnancy can be inconvenient. Fortunately, 54-year-old OB-GYN Dr. Adya Patel has a solution. “It’s called Rapid Birth Technique,” said Dr. Patel. “RBT is based on a series of Indian meditations and exercises that are normally used to enhance the … READ MORE
Gourmet Fench restaurants in New Orleans and Houston are knocking the competition dead – because all their waiters are zombies! Decked out in elegant waiter attire, the eerily listless creatures carry out their duties quietly and efficiently. The zombie waiters are the most hard-working employees at the trendy Camille’s Restaurant in the French Quarter. “They … READ MORE
VATICAN CITY – Pope Francis spent a good part of the day in the annual Halloween tradition at the Vatican: the Blessing of the Vampires. The annual vampire blessing began in the late 19th century by Pope Leo XII. People Leo decided that All Souls Day should include a blessing for vampires who would be … READ MORE
ALEXANDRIA, EGYPT – Cleopatra was a man – and the discovery of a secret scroll in a pyramid proves it! That’s the word from maverick historian Jessica Durbeen. She presents an overwhelming mountain of evidence – including some carvings – that bolster her claim. Durbeen concludes that the last active ruler of the Ptolemaic Empire … READ MORE
NOME, Alaska – A cruise in the Bering Strait was recently attacked and sunk under mysterious circumstances. The sole survivor of the assault on the liner Aunt Bee was first mate Sid Rodrigo, who had been on watch when – according to his sworn testimony – horror-struck from beneath the frozen sea. “We were five … READ MORE
NEW YORK, NY – Jeff Bezos is going to the center of the earth! For years he has been working on his Blue Origin project, trying to beat Elon Musk and Richard Branson to Mars, but now he is taking the lead by planning a trip to the center of Earth. In 2010, American geologists, … READ MORE
A super honey has been produced that appears to cure all wounds and infections! The bio-engineered product Surgihoney was tested on babies, new mothers, cancer patients and the elderly for over a year in Hampshire hospitals. Wounds and ulcers, including those infected with the superbug MRSA, healed within days, while the number of women who … READ MORE