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ZOMBIES BACK ROMNEY

PHOENIX –  Romney reached out and won the support of American Zombies!

Mitt Romney was reeling when he heard that aliens from Planet Zeeba were backing President Obama and forming a super-Pac.  He wanted to reach out to other “minority” Americans.  He met with the Werewolf Association and a prominent Vampire Pac, but both of them rejected Romney.  He looked into the Ghost Lobby, but they were also unimpressed with Romney.

Luckily, Romney found sympathetic ears at a gathering of Zombies in Michigan.  ”Mitt seems like he’s one of us already,” said Zombie spokesmen, Len Blathman (dead 100 years).  ”Mitt feels like a Zombie, talks like a Zombie and he often walks like a Zombie, so we are throwing our support behind him.”

Zombie reportedly have already eaten the brains of a number of Santorum supporters.  ”If we can’t convince them to change their minds, we simply eat their brains,” said Blathman.  ”It’s simple and it doesn’t cost much money to do.”

Mitt Romney was questioned by the mainstream media about his new bizarre association with Zombies and he dodged the issue.  ”We are an all-inclusive campaign and if Zombies want to join in, if they “believe in America” and they want to restore our country to greatness, we welcome them.”

When asked if he thought it was a bad idea to associate with beings that eat brains, kill people and turn them into Zombies, Romney responded,”well, that’s basically what the Obama Administration has been doing to Americans the last three years.  They have eaten our brains.”

President Obama had no comment, but his Press Secretary Jay Carney said, “as long as Zombies support free contraception for all women, living and dead, we have no problem with them.”

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11 Responses to “ZOMBIES BACK ROMNEY”

  1. Ralph says:

    Well, that would explain the 11 million dead registered voters Ive heard about.

  2. frank d.bunny says:

    that explains them saying "send more brains."

  3. [...] of them rejected Romney. He looked into the Ghost Lobby, but they were also unimpressed with Romney.Via weeklyworldnews.com This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. ← Are you prepared for [...]

  4. jackalope hunter says:

    Aliens back Santorum because he is an Alien.

  5. jakalope hunter says:

    The zombies that "back" Romney are owned by Romney.

  6. Nosmo King says:

    The Werewolf Association and the Vampire PAC is part of the Greater League of Official Monsters(GLoOM).

  7. andrew says:

    Mogul Cooperative (Zombie Pirates) have declared war on Romney.

  8. Zeebans Be Us says:

    [scrambls}cemdn38MK ≱≘≖⋅∨≈∳ ∻⊔ ∔⊺☍⋣ ∞ ∱≯⊩≍≶ ∧≊⋡⊲⊥ ∁≨ ≣⋠∅ ∍∦∓⊉ ≰☀ ⊼≞≔≲∎ ⋦⊨⊪⊯⊤≛{]

  9. [...] Romney already has the Zombie vote, so now he can count on the vampire vote as well. Share this:More Pin ItEmailLike this:LikeBe the first to like this post. [...]

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