BEIJING – China is preparing for war against every other nation in the world. They are confident they will be victorious.
China is preparing for conflict “in every direction’, the Defense Minister of China, Guang Wan, said on Wednesday in remarks that threaten to overshadow a visit to Beijing by U.S. Secretary of Defense, Robert Gates, next month.
“In the coming five years, our military will push forward with military conflict in every strategic direction,” said Guang Wan in an interview published in several state-backed newspapers in China. “We are living in peaceful times, but we can never be at peace until we are the dominant country in the world. It is time to bring out the horses and guns,” Mr. Wan said.
Yes, the Chinese are planning to battle other armies of the world with only guns and horses. “We have the manpower to overcome any nation and any new technology. Horses, guns and the Chinese desire for a peaceful Chinese world, is enough for us to win the battle,” said Chinese Military Commander, Lo Lang.
The Chinese, however, plan to win the war without fighting a battle. “When we send over ten million men on horses with guns into other countries – that should be sufficient to get that nation to surrender. There is no need for bloodshed, no need for war. Once they see our men, all countries will simply surrender to the Chinese way of life, which has be proven for thousands of years to be most superior way,” said Lang.
Irish President, William Layman, said that the Irish are ready to fight the Chinese – anywhere, anytime. “Our people have fought on horses with guns for centuries. If they step onto the Emerald Isle, they will be defeated. I, personally, will lead the Irish Army on the battlefield.”
German Defense Minister, George Behning, said that the Germans too would “be ready for any Chinese invasion.” Unlike President Laymen, Behning will NOT join his troops on the battlefield.
14 thoughts on “CHINA PREPARES FOR WAR”
Very funny… nice job! I look forward to watching the battles on YouTube!
“Are people have fought on horses with guns for centuries." I bet that Irish drunk meant 'our'.
no its a typo retard
They mention horses & men… but the key is the fireworks… billions of black cats which will deliver a coup de grace… that will change the face of history.
Boycott Wonton Soup to Protest these bellicose ways! – Beware of tiny IEDs desguised as egg rolls…
China will be biting the hand that feeds them. What will Walmart do? Their shelves will be empty.
LETS SEE IF CHINA CAN FACE THE MILITARY FORCES OF THE UNION OF NORTH AMERICA AND AUSTRALIAN ARMY… CHINESE PEOPLE CANNOT BEAT AMERICA CUZ AMERICANS FOUGHT IN MANY BATTLES. AND CHINESE FOUGHT ONLY IN PIRATED C.D. TAPES, A BUNCH OF USELESS PRODUCTS AND NARCOTICS… THATS THEY ONLY CAN DO…
You're crazy. They may not have the experience, but they have the sheer numbers to take anyone on.
The paint on their toys will kill them first.
Although this is a gag site and obviously a fake news… China preparing for war is indeed true. Not on horses but with a new stealth fighter jet comparable to the new upcoming f-35.
chinese are smart;and theres always a technology for sale!!
Chinese girls give great head, and their best head they give is to large Western c**ks.
Not tiny Chinese noodles.
Chinese girls like real men – Western Men – not Chinese men in boys bodies.
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