WASHINGTON – The White House reportedly is set to announce a redesign of the American flag.
Reports from sources close to the White House say that President Obama felt that the American flag, “like the Constitution,” was old and needed updating.
Here’s what the new flag will look like:
The administration is supposedly ordering all government buildings to begin displaying the flag on August 4th, 2012. That’s the President’s 51st birthday.
“The old flag has become a negative symbol around the world and many people in other countries are often burning it in protest,” said an aide close to White House insiders. ”The new flag will be a symbol of hope and change for the world and the White House believes that there will be far fewer flag burnings across the globe with the new flag.”
The Administration feels that President Obama’s face immediately makes a person think of the best parts of America: equality, fairness and respect. “President Obama’s face is more unifying than 50 stars,” an aide to a Democratic operative said. “Out of many, one.”
The President is reportedly planning on making a speech at the official unveiling of the flag. In the speech, he intends to apologize to the world for the negative symbol that the flag has become. ”Our new flag is one that will bring the world together, in harmony, peace and love,” a senior aide reportedly told WWN.
The flag is already being flown outside the Capitol Building:
There are some houses in Lake County, Florida that got an “advanced copy” of the flag – and are proudly flying it.
But tempers are flaring over the new version of the American flag. A veterans group says the flag is an outrage. Korean war veteran Don Van Beck said his blood was boiling.
“I can’t describe how upset I was because you just don’t do that to the American flag,” Van Beck said.
The White House appreciates Van Beck’s position, but his views will not stop production of the new flag. The Federal Reserve has reportedly already set aside $300 million – so every man, woman and child in American can have a flag.
The Administration is also planning to sponsor an official “American” basketball sneaker:
America, America…
check this out
I am so deeply disheartened by this display….I am 1st an American…2nd a woman…3rd a registered independent voter…..One group of people voted 4 and another group stuffed ballot boxes for an administration that has in less than 4 yrs…..destroyed these UNITED STATES……I will never again vote 4 another Democrat until that group denounces tyrannical forces…..I was lax in reading and studying American history…..I was taught about America from the WRONG side, the side that wants America to go ‘forward so far that it falls on its face’.
But I have invested my time in learning who and what this great country America is!! No other people have ever had what we have and unless more people stop following and become individuals we will cease to BE the free.
Your hatred for the black guy in the White House obviously knows no bounds. If you really were as studious as you claim to be you'd have done some fact-checking and discovered that this is a faked story designed to pull in herds of gullible right-wingers. You got caught, big time. Now go back and take a real history class.
Can I buy a roll of toilet tissue with Obama's face on it?
YES YOU CAN !
GOOGLE = TOILET PAPER WITH OBAMA'S PICTURE ON IT !
BE CAREFUL WHEN USING IT , HE COULD BITE YOU YOU IN THE BUTT !
are you people retarted? this is obviously a joke
HERE'S OBAMA !
obama toilet paper is made in the USA
obama toilet paper is made in the USA
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CLEARING AWAY THE HYPE WITH EVERY SINGLE WIPE!
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Don't get caught up in the excitement of using Obama Toilet Paper and forget the basic tenants of bathroom behavior – remember to always wash your hands after wiping your butthole with a picture of the president.
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Is Obama committing treason…….another Hitler….communistic views…..wake up America
With all the problems we are dealing with, including the economy, unemployment, terrorism, and the country's
debt that we can never pay back, why would the President be dallying with the flag, apologizing to terriorists who
killed four Americans, and looking for ways to waste more money? A real President has more important things
to be concerned with.
Guest, you need to check out in more ways than one. THE STORY IS A JOKE!! You've been duped and are too consumed with right-wing hatred to realize it.
Come on…..look at the page this is posted on. You people can't be serious! Use the brains that God gave you.
Are u flipping serious!!! Obama is the worst president we have ever had!!! why does he get to put his nasty face on our American flag, when he isn't a true American!!! I would never hang that up in my yard unless I was gonna target practice!!!!
I agree. who does he think he is??? He is just another jerk trying to take over . He works for us, when is he going to realize this. The people should decide whether or not our flag should be changed. Our flag is the most beautiful in the world, and should not be changed. Whenever I see it up and waving. I get the greatest feeling. that I can't explain. Is this one of the changes he promised. He didn't keep the most important ones. Read between the lines re: his promises, everybody!!! He's getting away with too much. We need a change in November..
Hell ya amen to that. He doesn't deserve to be in office. No TRUE American so he claims would mess with OUR flag. Obama doesn't deserve to be called an American much less be leading ACTUAL AMERICANS.
Obama you my friend are stupid as hell if u think all us rednecks are gonna fly that lame ass flag you designed from what I’ve read… I would use that flag to wipe my ass with an then burn it in a bonfire lol… Honestly must you stoop down to a level so low that you want to take away our flag? That’s not only our heritage but its what we all stand for you dumbass….
Do you still own the brains God supposedly gave you at birth? THE STORY IS A JOKE. THIS IS A SATIRICAL SITE AND YOU FELL FOR IT FULL FACE-PLANT!
his red stripes are the bloody hand prints of those americans killed in the us embassy
Don't worry so much. By your logic, GW had the blood of 2966 Americans (we still capitalize America, right) on his hands.
Really people?….. in the article it says "The administration is supposedly ordering all government buildings to begin displaying the flag on August 4th, 2012." Um, so how many of those flags have you seen? This is BS people stop being sheep
Is it true that when a bunch of right-wingers go on a trip their itinerary is called "Gullibles' Travels"?
Anyone that believes this – I have some beautiful property to give away in Alaska. You can see Russia from your back yard.
Fuck mr.obama ill burn ever one of his flags and raise my american flag IMPEACH OBAMA!
Your plan sounds great.
Great line – too bad that short statement has at least six mistakes that even a 4th grade teacher would cream you on, moron. But I do like the touch of "…ever one…." 'cause that's how morons say "every" – pronouncing it "ever."
Thanks for the a.m. laugh, jackass!!
What do you expect from someone who has so much right-wing prejudice that they land on a satirical site and think the stories are real, just because they involve the black guy in the White House. No wonder clowns like Akin and Ryan have such large followings.
It is up to the AMERICAN PEOPLE to vote on updating the Constitution and our FLAG it is not his place. He has a NAPOLEON attitude and it is NOT going to FLY HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The story is a satire. Your hatred for the black guy in the white house is so great you never even realized it. You've been pranked big time.
There is a lot more to changing the American flag than the President deciding to change it and ordering new ones made. Besides the August 4th date for it to be presented to the public has past. It is a crying shame that people have nothing better to do than try to stir up people in this country over fabricated stories. Our President knew going in that he had people saying they were not willing to work with him. It is a shame that those people put their personal feelings before the citizens of this country. That it was more important fr them to stand against the President in all things than to help our Country to heal. Shame on all those people. Hate never fixes anything.
You ARE aware this is a humor site, right???
OBAMA IS OF SATAN ( WOLF IN SHEEP'S CLOTHING ) , ( EVIL , EVIL ) !
ALL OF THE SLEEPING PEOPLE IN THIS COUNTRY NEED'S TO WAKE UP REAL FAST AND SEE WHAT THIS MAGGOT IS AND WILL DO TO THIS COUNTRY !
HE IS DESTROYING THE CONSTITUTION , GAS PRICES DOUBLED SINCE HE TOOK OFFICE , STOPPING OIL DRILLING AND COAL PRODUCTION , WAST MONEY ON GREEN ENERGY , ALL THE MONEY THAT WAS GIVEN TO THE GREEN ENERGY MOVEMENT WAS JUST A WAY TO FUNNEL THE MONEY BACK INTO THE DEMOCRATS POCKETS AT THE TAX PAYERS EXPENSE !
Turn off your caps lock, take off your tin-foil hat, swallow your meds, switch off Fox.
You've been hooked by a satirical prank and swallowed it like a fish grabs a lure.
ANYBODY who believes this is a bloody IDIOT!
Shhhh! You're giving away the Republicans' secret qualification for party membership.
i feel its a disgrace to the united state to have his face on the flag kennedy did want to change the flag and he was the best in office obama wasnt even born a citizen of the us he shouldnt of been able to be president come on you americans stand up for what is right he needs to leave things alone only the antichist will be able to change the flag because certain things have to pass its part of gods plans beware all around you praise god in the name of jesus chirst the real lord amen and amen
You're so consumed with right-wing birther hatred for Obama that it never, ever dawned on you that the story is a satire. It's a fake and YOU FELL FOR IT. Go watch Faux Noise, it's at least as accurate.
Stop thumping your Bible long enough for some sanity to enter your ears. To quote Foghorn Leghorn (and his progenitor Sen. Claghorn) IT'S A JOKE, SON! You're so full of extreme-right hysteria that you fell into it full-face.
EVERY BODY SHOULD BUY ONE OF OBAMA'S FLAG AND PUT IT IN THERE BUG OUT BAG TO BE USED AS FIRE TINDER OR WIPING PAPERS !
You DO realize this is a joke site, don't you?
Well, with orthography "every body" and "there" maybe not…
FUCK OBAMA!!!!!!!!
You idiots realize this site is like the national enquirer right? All of it is purposely fake. Geez
You people are all blooming idiots for believing this crap. You should not even be allowed to vote. I swear people are getting dummer and dummer to the point that it is scary. I wish they would pass a law that before you could vote you would have to have a psycological evaluation first. You have no common sense whatsoever and you believe everything you read on the Internet, especially on Facebook. God are you people really Americans?
so then why should we believe what you wrote???
"dummer and dummer", don't you mean dumber and dumber? Lol.
Thank you for creating this website so easy to find information. great stuff. Saving this one for later.
Only Liberal Progressives are Arrogant enough to create a flag like this. As a former U. S. Marine this version of the AMERICAN FLAG is a disgrace! DON'T MESS WITH THE FLAG!