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vampire

VAMPIRES ON THE LOOSE IN CHICAGO

April 1, 2022March 31, 2022 by Tap Vann

Residents of Chicago are dealing with a vampire infestation!

Categories Headlines, TopStory Tags chicago, garlic, legend, mystery, rahm emanuel, serbia, true blood, twilight, vampire, vampires, Windy City

THE THREE STOOGES RETURN… AS VAMPIRES!

March 14, 2020March 14, 2020 by Boyce Day

HE WHO NYUKS Perhaps no slapstick comedy act is as beloved as the Three Stooges, the group of brothers (and others) led by Moe Howard that was active from 1920 … READ MORE

Categories Headlines Tags dracula, larry fine, vampire, vampires

ROMNEY IS A VAMPIRE

March 7, 2021May 14, 2012 by Frank Lake

President Obama has confirmed what Newt Gingrich first announced: Mitt Romney is a vampire.

Categories Mutants, Politics Tags Bain Capital, Brain Capital, mitt romney, vampire, vampires, zombies

VAMPIRE KILLS RUSSIAN LIVESTOCK

August 4, 2011 by Tap Vann


NOVOSIBIRSK – A vampire has been killing thousands of goats in Russia.

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Categories Headlines, Mutants, TopStory Tags goats, killing, russian, twilight, vampire, vampires

VAMPIRE WOMAN

April 7, 2011 by Tap Vann

MONTERREY –  A vampire woman is on the loose in Mexico.

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Categories Headlines, TopStory Tags catholic, fangs, mexico, vampire, vampires

STUDY: 1 IN 5 AMERICAN TEENS IS A VAMPIRE

August 22, 2010 by Frank Lake

A new Pew Research Poll reveals that 19% of American teens are vampires.

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Categories Headlines, Mutants, TopStory Tags Bella, blood, bloody, Breaking Dawn, dracula, Eclipse, fangs, garlic, Jacob, rolling stone, Stephanie Meyer, sunshine, Team Edward, Team Jacob, true blood, twilight, vampire, vampire bat

VAMPIRE SKULL FOUND

March 11, 2009 by Gerry Dorsey

vampire_skull

VENICE – An archaeologist excavating mass graves of plague victims in Venice has discovered the skull of an alleged vampire!

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Categories Mutants, TopStory Tags italy, vampire, vampires, venice

SOPHIA LOREN UNDEAD?

February 23, 2009 by Tap Vann

LOS ANGELES, CA – Sophia Loren was summoned to present at the 81st Academy Awards last night, but many of the younger actresses were warned to stay away.

Categories Celebs Tags angelina jolie oscars, anne hathaway, dracula, halle berry, kate winslet, oscar pictures, oscar winners, vampire, vampires, who won the oscars, youtube oscars

CHENEY COMES OUT OF THE COFFIN

November 20, 2008 by Reginald Cunningham III

WASHINGTON, DC – Vice President Dick Cheney has announced that he is a Vampire.  At a press conference in the hours before dawn, Cheney stated, “I am an Undead-American.”

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Categories Headlines, TopStory Tags cheney, dick cheney, dickcheney, eastern europe, log-cabin republicans, republican party, true blood, twilight, vampire, vice president dick cheney, washington d.c.

BAT BOY LINES UP TO MEET 'TWILIGHT' STAR

November 13, 2008 by Reginald Cunningham III

PHILADELPHIA, PA – Whether he’s a fan of the books or just trying to make friends, Bat Boy was spotted waiting in line to meet the star of the upcoming film “Twilight”.

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Categories Mutants, TopStory Tags Bat Boy, batboy, mosquitoes, pennsylvania, philadelphia, robert pattinson, twilight, vampire, vampires
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