Submit your photo to Weekly World News
TOP STORIES
dinosaur_zoo
sea_butterflies
flying_witches
solar_flare

PRESIDENT OBAMA’S BIRTH CERTIFICATE


president_obamas_birth_certificate

WASHINGTON, DC – The official copy of Barack Obama’s birth certificate was stolen this week by Republicans wishing to halt his health care reform.

Since before the election there has been a great deal of speculation regarding President Obama’s birth certificate.  A growing movement among conservatives known as “Birthers” believes Barack Obama was actually born in Kenya and wants legislation passed requiring Presidents to provide an official copy of their birth certificate.

Earlier this week a group of conservatives stole the Presidents birth certificate, and are now holding it ransom to stall talks on Health Care reform.  The group stealing the certificate was lead by Florida Representative Bill Posey.  He, along with California Congressman John Campbell, led an elite squad of commandoes in a daring heist at the Honolulu hospital where the document, real or forged, was kept.

Now, with the issue of his legitimacy to be President in the hands of his opponents, Barack Obama is forced to stall on pushing forward his Health Care plan.  Republicans want the reforms watered down to more favor profit generating insurance companies.  Republicans believe that more socialized health care could lead to the unnecessary deaths of thousands of Americans every year.

The White House has refused to comment on the situation.  They won’t comment on the burglary or if the document in Republican hands is genuine.  If it is fake, or a Kenyan certificate, then Obama will have to abdicate the Presidency.  If it is real, he will likely have to suffer through criticisms of his heritage for as long as he is of African descent.

When and how Republicans will play their hand remains to be seen.  Washington insiders believe the document now rests in Dick Cheney’s man sized safe in his castle fortress, next to a jar containing Saddam Hussein’s head and indecent pictures of Margaret Thatcher.

31 Responses to “PRESIDENT OBAMA’S BIRTH CERTIFICATE”

  1. Guan says:

    This article is far-fetched. I wish it is TRUE!

  2. Lonnie Dawson says:

    Calling President Bush…calling President Bush…time to take your old job back until we can have a do over election. Effin' democrats have done it to the country again.

    • j-m says:

      Lonnie… check the dosage on your meds. You're clutch is slipping.

    • @ssndrd says:

      If this is all you have to worry about, God bless you. Instead of wasting your time on crap like this why don't you go out and help maybe the homeless (there seems to be alot more since your wonderful Bush was in office), forgotten children. etc. I think I will help more that have been hurt by Bush and his cronies.

  3. carly says:

    Dobbs joined the idiots yesterday. I don't understand why CNN doesn't pull him off. There is a related post at http://iamsoannoyed.com/?page_id=588

  4. Sherrill says:

    Good grief! Obama's mother was a US Citizen, so therefore Barak is a US Citizen. Get off the nut wagon!

    • Alice in Ohio says:

      Both parents must be US citizens in order for the child to be a citizen regardless of where he is born in the world. Obama's father was not! If he is really a US citizen why is he refusing to produce a certified/original birth certificate and put an end to all this???

      Alice in Ohio

    • james carl black says:

      Alice,
      Last time you wrote in you signed "Lonnie" as your name.
      This is clear evidence that your meds need adjusting you poor soul….

    • old1 says:

      Alice, to be President he would need to be a Natural Born American Citizen, simply a citizen will not work. Natural Born is Born of Blood and Soil. The Blood of two (2) American Citizen Parents and birth taking place on American Soil. Miss any of these 3 requirements and you fail the test for Presidential eligibility.

    • Byron Williams says:

      A natural born citizen is a person who has citizenship from birth, as opposed to a naturalized citizen who is one who attains citizenship by approval of application from the government.

      The only U.S. document to define who is a natural born citizen is the First Congress, Seesion II, Chapt. III Sect. 1. It clearly states that "the children of citizens of the United States, that may be born beyond sea, or out of the limits of the United States, shall be considered as natural born citizens: Provided, That the right of citizenship shall not descend to persons whose fathers have never been resident in the United States."

      Since Obama's mother is a natural born American citizen and his father has been a resident in the U.S. he is by the definition outlined above a natural born citizen.

      However, the following changes to U.S. immigration law also apply:

      Any person who has a parent who is a U.S citizen could be a natural citizen provided they meet the following criteria:

      A child born abroad to one U.S. citizen parent and one alien parent acquires U.S. citizenship at birth under Section 301(g) INA provided the citizen parent was physically present in the U.S. for the time period required by the law applicable at the time of the child's birth. (For birth on or after November 14, 1986, a period of five years physical presence, two after the age of fourteen is required. For birth between December 24, 1952 and November 13, 1986, a period of ten years, five after the age of fourteen are required for physical presence in the U.S. to transmit U.S. citizenship to the child.

      Since Obama has lived in the U.S. since 1971 (when he was 10), he clearly meets the criteria of the changed immigration law.

      Of course, if his birth certificate is a fake, then all of the above legal citings are moot, since forging a legal document is a felony.

  5. Tomboy says:

    This article is just a bit of humor, however, the crisis we face as a nation is very real. Obama, by his own admission, was a dual citizen (British/American or Kenyan/American) until he reached the age of 20. While he may or may not be a US citizen depending on the circumstances of his birth (face it guys, no one can prove this one way or the other until we see his long form BC, NOT the COLB he had posted on the internet which is worthless for proving this point) he cannot possibly be a "natural born citizen". By definition, a "natural born" citizen is one who is born on US territory of parents who are BOTH US citizens. Unless, his father was someone other than BHO Sr., who was never a US citizen, BHO Jr. is not a "natural born" citizen, period. Perhaps we will find out that his father is someone other than BHO Sr. and an US citizen. That may put the natural born citizen fire out, but will be very embarassing for Obama. This is the only other reasonable explanation that I can come up with for him to refuse to show his real BC. It may be 4 years from now, but the truth will eventually come out.

  6. RayRay says:

    Google the name Frank Marshall Davis

  7. Common Sense says:

    Because he doesn’t have anything to prove to you morons lol

  8. Who cares where he was born, he sucks on all levels – my stimulus check was $2 I saved it as it would cost more to cash it. I made $5,200 in 'taxable income' last year but have to pay out $2,500 in taxes – yes, I DO have all the paperwork to prove this. It's because I'm a poor, white, childless, unmarried woman…if this was happening to anyone other than a white person it would be a crime! I can't even go to the ER for chrissakes and they even let freakin' non-resident illegal aliens in there!! C'mon….tell ME how great the puppet prez is…and I'll show you my legal documents on all I've just tooted.

    • Byron Williams says:

      Really? You must have made a miscalculation on your tax return then because you're only liable for a 10% federal tax, which comes to $520, not $2500. Of course, if you're including state and local taxes, it would be a bit more. But most states don't have an income tax above 6%, and local taxes are usually around 1 to 3%. Then there is Social Security, which adds something like 7.5%. So your total tax liability would be at most around 26%, which would come to $1352.

  9. old1 says:

    "Help the homeless"? Let's save America and get us a real legal President. Let the homeless help themselves. Tell them to get a job. Tell that to Obama too!

  10. Get Lost says:

    Until Obama or the State of Hawaii releases his ACTUAL birth certificate – the original document – then Obama's legitimacy should, and will, remain in question. Why don't they just release the original document? . . . Unless there isn't one to release . . . The COLB, printed in 2007, is not a birth certificate and has no weight. Obama remains "undocumented" for meeting the qualifications to be President.

  11. kEMOSWABBIE says:

    all we have worry about ????? Our country is being run my an illegal allien and a muslim to boot…… all we have to worry about ????? Gheesh you need to get a life and quit believing all the Obama propaganda!!!!!!!!!!!! W A K E U P A M E R I C A

  12. chey says:

    actually as long as your born in the U.S you are considered to be a U.S citizen…and Have any of you lost a birth certificate and had to get a new one??? There is nothing to it.. Osama bin Laden could have gotten a U.S birth certificate. Have any of you actually looked up obamas birth certificate online??? Well there is one for Kenya and one for Hawaii…and I must say the one for Kenya looks a bit more legit. I strongly disagree with our president at this time..and the man who introduced him to christianity said on public television GD America. He believes in no restrictions on abortion as well as believes in gay marriage!!!

  13. Eff that, help the homeless – that's the dumbest thing I ever heard. They don't even have air-conditioning and they smell like shit. Plus they never contribute when we host the potluck. Stingy bastards…

  14. Gloria says:

    ..if I have to show my proof of citizenship to get a drivers' license why can't Barry Soetoro a/k/a Barrack Obama show his?? or show his medical records? or show his education records? what does he have to hide?? the answer is he DOES have something to hide and the fact that he doesn't show all his records is an offense to our Constitution and to those who uphold it and have died to defend it…wake up people… there's an impostor at the helm dismantling our country before our eyes…and no…I"m not a extremist, racist, I could care less if the Prez is purple or green as long as he is a "natural born' American as the Constitution requires.

    • S.G. says:

      Gloria: If you really wanted the truth about President Obama's birth place, you and all the other dumb bigots out there merely could check out the passport of his mother, to find out where she was at the time of his birth. Case closed. By the way, since you certainly don't consider yourself an extremist, racist, i am sure that you also questioned George Bush's, John McCain, and Ronald Reagan's birth place.

  15. I think the issue has been over-blown, esp. given the likely results. I have just posted one what is being lost as these webs are spun. See: http://soozah.wordpress.com/2009/10/12/consolidat

  16. Joa says:

    Why is Dunham/Soetoro/Obama allowed to use taxpayer money to keep from showing his Birth Certificate? It is quite interesting that the Lawyers even threatens to ruin people if they do not drop the lawsuit. This is all first class bull. If he were white, he would have had to show the long form bc after the first request. I was afraid this would happen, and lo and behold, racism has been revived by the Jesse jackson's and Al Sharpton's of the world! The ones that do not and will not help poor blacks except to create wealth for themselves. THE REAL PROBLEM FOR POOR BLACKS ARE THE BLACKS WHO PRETEND TO HELP, BUT KNOW THAT IF THEY DO HELP TOO MUCH, THEY WILL NOT BE NEEDED!!!

    BO helps no one except his family and the Chicago gang in the White House. Legal? I don't think so, unliess his name is Emily or Susie Jane.

  17. Benjamin says:

    Why is the FBI and CIA not involved ? It is hard to believe that this is actually happenning in the USA to the highest office/Commander in Chief. Is there any common sense left in the USA. Our regulatory agencies have failed us again, as they have for the past 50 years. It is time to replace all the rats in Congress.

  18. Cae says:

    Democrat Barack Hussein Obama

    -

    ILLEGAL ALIEN

  19. Gunslinger says:

    OBVIOUSLY Sherrill, you are an illiterate who never read the U.S. Constitution. Whether you like it or not, your White House Boy is NOT eligible to be President BY LAW OF THE LAND. But, nobody has the REAL nuts to take on the Federal Government by SUING THE DEMOCRAT BASTARDS FOR FRAUD! BOTH PARENTS MUST be U.S. Citizens, either born or naturalized, for Obongo to be legally eligible to RUN for President, much less be President. Try READING something besides blogs and Chick Magazines for a change, babe. If you can handle words larger than three letters. Drink some more Hopey/Changey Kool-Aid until you puke on your Obongo T-Shirt…please.

  20. itil says:

    The need for much more pc experts again gives rise to the increased require for more and more computer training institutes. Proper computer coaching from a reputed institute is the ladder through which IT aspirants can shape their profession within the related sector.

  21. Thanks for that. We’re having a little potluck party this month, for Xmas I guess and I’ve been trying to find something unique.. found some awesome ideas at this potluck recipe site. You know, someone should invent a website where you can write what you’ll be taking, and it would check no one is bringing the same thing!

  22. Joseph Long says:

    Actually, NEITHER parent needs to be a citizen. Obama just had to be born on US soil. Under our legal system, YOU must present evidence that our president was NOT born here. He doesn’t have to prove anything.

Leave a Reply