WASILLA, AK – Rumors of Sarah Palin’s divorce have surfaced. Sources claim she is leaving Todd for a Bigfoot.
Sarah Palin, who recently abdicated as Governor of Alaska, refuses to abdicate the spotlight. This week rumors began to surface that she may be getting a divorce from her husband Todd. Sources claim it would be for the love of a Bigfoot.
Palin has been a scourge of the Sasquatch community for some time now. Since quitting her job as Governor she has spent most of her time relaxing by hunting the noble and incredibly rare Bigfoot community. The owner or a rural Alaska hotel outside Palmer on Route 1, who wishes to remain anonymous, says she and one of the beasts have fallen in love.
The hotel owner says that Palin often stayed in her small establishment, trying to remain incognito but still answering most questions with her trademark “You betcha!” and wink. According to the source while on the hunt one day Palin looked into the animals eyes, which she always does before killing something, and found a connection she had long lost with her husband Todd. She found a shared passion with one of the animals, a passion fueled by frustration and mutual dislike, a passion they could not control.
With increasing frequency Palin would stay at the small motel, although spending less time in the woods and more time in her room with a Do Not Disturb sign up. The noises they made confused the owner and scared her chickens.
Palin’s representatives said that she has spent much of her time recently on the Alaskan Trail, a mountain trail running from Anchorage to Seattle. According to their reports Palin has been alone on the trail thinking, and plotting her next political move.
The source, who insists on remaining anonymous, says that depending on how Palin reacts to the truth being told she may seek to publish the romance novel she has written about the affair “Mighty Huntress, Naked Man-Beast.” There is no evidence supporting this sources claims, however the first few pages of her novel were surprisingly good.