LONDON – Susan Boyle lost “Britain’s Got Talent” this weekend, sparking riots across the UK.
This Saturday on the season finale of “Britain’s Got Talent”, crowd favorite Susan Boyle took second place to London based dance troupe Diversity.
Susan Boyle shot to international fame when the humble singer wowed audiences with her vocal power. The 47-year-old who has never been kissed became an instant hero to rural people.
Shortly after the decision was announced, devoted fans across the United Kingdom broke out in violence.
Ornate and whimsical teapots were smashed in rage as news spread of Boyle’s defeat. Residents of small villages, who saw Boyle as one of their own, were the hardest hit when she lost the competition. Surrey called in the British National Defense Force when suburban families took to the streets in anger. Riot police had to use tear gas on a group of 4000 middle aged people wearing mostly tweed.
Residents of North Berkshire burned the local BBC building to the ground. Effigies of the Diversity troupe were burned in the Lincoln town square. In Boyle’s hometown of Blackburn Scotland members of her parish church stripped naked and painted themselves blue before going into a violent rage that left 3 dozen English soccer hooligans begging for mercy.
Susan Boyle has since been hospitalized from the stress of the weekend’s events. British Prime Minister Gordon Brown, thankful to have something to distract people from his own current scandal, has said a formal recount will be requested in the interest of national security.
Leave the poor woman alone. Yes she lost, but it doesn't mean it's the end for her… only the beginning. An angelic voice like won't be easily forgotten and she will be successful 🙂 God bless you Susan!!!
The following did NOT happen, shame on you making us Brits seem mad!!!!!!!!
Quote [Ornate and whimsical teapots were smashed in rage as news spread of Boyle’s defeat. Residents of small villages, who saw Boyle as one of their own, were the hardest hit when she lost the competition. Surrey called in the British National Defense Force when suburban families took to the streets in anger. Riot police had to use tear gas on a group of 4000 middle aged people wearing mostly tweed.
Residents of North Berkshire burned the local BBC building to the ground. Effigies of the Diversity troupe were burned in the Lincoln town square. In Boyle’s hometown of Blackburn Scotland members of her parish church stripped naked and painted themselves blue before going into a violent rage that left 3 dozen English soccer hooligans begging for mercy]
I think you're right an onymous – I checked elsewhere on the 'net and didn't find any signs of Brits (or Scots) rioting over her losing the contest. I think she, herself, threw a couple of fits, but that's all I found.
Of course that's why this is just a bathroom entertainment mag and no one should ever get upset or crazy over the stories…because they're just that stories…
Maybe one of the writers thought it would be nice if Brits and/or Scots HAD rioted for the woman? The world may never know <mysterious, almost extraterrestrial smile>
Dont get me wrong, this report did make me laugh and Subo (as we call her in the uk) has gone nutty. but it would have been more funny if it was written in a more believable manner. Riots yes, smashing teapots yes but I mean come on church members going naked & painting themselves blue?!?!?!?!. LOL
I enjoy this website because most of whats written here you do tend to have to stop and think……..fact or fiction!
I heard Stoke On Trent was in flames over this…..someone needs to riot over this….Poll Tax is one thing but this woman had legitimate and undeniable talent.
SHES AN ALIEN!!! HER VOICE IS HOW ALIENS COMMUNICATES WITH US!!… their everywhereee
sorry but blackburn isnt in scotland.
I got news she is out and feeling better