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AL GORE BUYS 20 OIL WELLS

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After selling his Current TV to Al Jazeera, Al Gore bought oil wells in the Gulf of Mexico.

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In a blockbuster deal with Exxon Mobil and with the blessing of the Obama Administration, Al Gore has purchased 20 oil wells, which he will be operating in the Gulf of Mexico, close to the Alabama and Louisiana shorelines.

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“Mr. Gore is an environmental pioneer and we trust him more than anyone else on the planet to do the right thing for the environment,” said a source at The White House.

Gore just a pocketed nine-figure sum from a news organization funded by the Qatari government. The Qatari government, of course, is funded by the country’s immense oil wealth.  Gore has become fast friends with oil sheiks and now feels that it is possible to run an oil company and be an environmentalist.

“Al wants to use the millions he made from big oil to create more oil that he can control and eventually, in the next hundred years or so, completely eliminate from the planet,” said a source close to Al Gore.

Here’s Al Gore with Exxon CEO, Rex Tillerson:

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Gore promised the Obama Administration that “there will never be an oil spill on any of my rigs or any of the ships transporting my oil.”

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When Gore appeared on The Today Show, Matt Lauer asked him about the purchase of the oil rigs and the hypocrisy of being an environmentalist and an oil well owner.  “Look, it might not seem to make sense, but if you watched The Godfather, you have to keep your friends close, and your enemies closer. So that’s what I’m doing.  I’m becoming the enemy so I can be a better friend,” Gore reportedly told Lauer.