PORTLAND, OR – After a 1,900% tax hike was proposed to help the state budget, Oregon residents have protested by dumping beer into the Portland harbor.
The state of Oregon is currently facing a budget deficit, much like many states during the recession. The lawmakers proposing the hefty tax hike state the extra money will go towards prevention, treatment and recovery programs for those addicted to alcohol and other substances.
But consumers and local beer brewers are rallying against the tax hike, both to save microbrewers and to keep pint prices down. David Mulligan, owner of Portland Porthouse, said, “All of that hike is going to go right to the consumer. We’re a small, family brewery, we can’t cut corners here. I don’t think those lawmakers have a clue what kind of riot they’ll have on their hands if a pint goes up to $6.”
Despite their peaceful, laid-back reputation, some residents have pre-emptively shown their anger by sneaking onto boats in the harbor and throwing cases of beer into the water. Jim Snyder, a local investment banker, agreed to speak to Weekly World News about the protest. “We are just following the old American tradition of opposing unfair taxation!”
When asked if they were using beer stolen from the ship ala the Boston Tea Party, Snyder looked confused and responded, “Well, uh, no, we bought it at a local grocery store and Bob’s wife over there brought it in her mini-van.” A middle-aged woman in a lawn-chair waved happily from the dock.
The five men onboard explained that they will continue dumping the beer in the harbor until the tax hike is struck down, or the police politely ask them to leave.
Only way CL would make good beer is if you used it for the water in a good brew recipe!
Ace,
Clearly you are unable to think effectively. You are talking to RON TURNER hear…