CHRIS BROWN VS. THE WORLD

[mpoverlay]ORLANDO — For anyone who has followed entertainment news, singer
Chris Brown has gained a reputation for bringing violence to his
fellow man. Today is no different, as Brown spontaneously began to
fight every person in sight while performing in Orlando last night.
“He seems to be battling everyone but his inner demons these days,”
says Erin Lawson, a Florida disc jockey who was hosting the event. “He
just started throwing punches, left and right.”

Brown’s rampage continued beyond the concert, quickly moving up the
town’s College Avenue and continuing on to nearby towns. From elderly
women to unsuspecting toddlers, Brown has given everyone his signature
haymaker as he moves through the Southern portion of the U.S. His
punch toll has been moved to 12,739, as of this report.
Though police have been in pursuit of the Virginia native for some
time, Brown seems to have a special adeptness at evading the law. He’s
already eluded capture in Mississippi and is reported to have begun an
all-out assault in Arkansas. No one is quite sure what triggered this
current episode.
“You’d think after seeing how this guy behaves, something could have
been done by now,” one bystander said. “I mean, this violates his
probation, right? I would hope so.”
Authorities are currently blocking off all major roadways in order to
capture Brown. However, many say this will have no effect on the
rampage, as he abandoned his new Audi R8 several towns ago.
“If anything, the car slows him down,” Lawson says. “I’m surprised he
isn’t live-tweeting this whole thing, too.”
WWN will continue to follow this story.
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