Home » AN ENTIRE CITY IN TREVOR NOAH’S HAIR!

AN ENTIRE CITY IN TREVOR NOAH’S HAIR!

Welcome to Trevor Heights

An entire city of 11,000 is flourishing in the most unlikely of places: inside Trevor Noah’s hair. 

The city, Trevor Heights, was founded in 2017 by Howard Kenilworth, a tiny man, nearly microscopic. “We needed a place to live,” he said. “I was moving from place to place with my family. That’s when it occurred to me. We should live in Trevor Noah’s hair!”

Kenilworth and his family built a house, and Kenilworth set up an optometry practice. His children were lonely at first but within a month they knew they had made the right choice. “We just felt so at home,” he said. 

Others followed. “George Harris, the lawyer, came in, as did Fran Loomis, the car dealer. And then there was a big influx with all kinds of people: models, boxers, teachers, bricklayers. Our little town was suddenly a thriving small city.”

MISCONCEPTIONS

Kenilworth says that when you’re a city in Trevor Noah’s hair, it’s easy to be misunderstood. “For starters, people like to diminish our achievement by pretending that there are many cities in many celebrities’ hair. I’ve heard about a city in Michael Douglas’s hair, a city in Linda Lavin’s hair, a city in Akwafina’s hair. Not of that is true. We are the one and only city of this type, though the historical record shows that there was a small town in Gabby Hayes’s beard.”

The nature of the hosting relationship has led to unkind rumors about the city’s host. “People assume that if you have a city in your hair that it’s somehow dirty, like bugs in dirt or dust,” said Kenilworth. “That couldn’t be further from the truth. I can personally attest to the fact that Trevor Noah has extremely good hygiene. We call it ‘weather.’”

Noah’s job as a television host gives the city ample sunlight. “And since our ears are so tiny, being even tinier than our bodies,” said Kenilworth, “noise from the show, or the audience’s applause, can’t get in. We only hear the sounds that other people in town make, like Abolished Lasagna.” He laughed. “Oh, you probably don’t know them. They’re the top rock band in town. My nephew Greg is the lead singer and guitarist.”

DOES NOAH KNOW?

The big question surrounding Trevor Heights is whether the Noah himself knows of its existence. “To be honest, I can’t answer that,” said Kenilworth. “Our mayor, Jane Jackson, came to me last year with that same question. She wanted to present Trevor Noah with an award. We reached out to his people but we never heard back. If you want my personal opinion, I think he does not know that we’re here.”

A wistful look came over his face. “But I’d certainly like to meet the man and shake his hand. He’s done so much for us. I’m forever indebted.”

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