Lehman CEO Admits That He Forgot How To Count!
“Frankly, Bagel Fridays made it very difficult to concentrate on work.”
Headlines
Glow from Mars Creates Problems in Transylvania
Lovesick werewolves are causing big trouble in Transylvania — and the problem could spread to the United States
US Navy Captures Lake Michigan Monster
The US Navy captured a 140-foot monster in Lake Michigan on September 16 and a secret Pentagon photograph proves it!
Southern Farmer Requires Everyone to Pitch In
“Everybody here needs to lend me a helping hand because I’ve been doing pretty much all the work.”
Giant Vampire Bat Bites Miner's Butt
A coal miner is nursing a sore tush and a fear that he’s destined to join the ranks of the undead!
Three-Legged Model Wows NY Fashion Week!
Yes, beautiful Celine is dazzling the runway world by strutting her stuff on three gams.
Dinosaurs Found on Mars
NASA’s Mars Lander has transmitted a photograph of a super-sized dinosaur standing on the surface of Mars
HUMAN BAT DISCOVERED IN ITALY
Natalie and Chris Suhree were eating spaghetti and meatballs and discussing mafia politics when they heard the screams
Aquatic Pit Bull
Here comes a terrifying new breed of mutant creature — half goldfish, half piranha!
Russians Train Mummy Air Force
Surveillance photos reveal the Russian air command has been training the undead as paratroopers