NEW JERSEY -  Donna Simpson is closing in on her quest to be The World’s Fattest Woman!

Donna Simpson, a hero to fat woman around the globe (including Oprah Winfrey), is closing in on her dream to be the fattest woman in the world.  She ate  50,000 calories on Christmas day -getting her that much closer to her 1,000lb goal.

She’s tipping the scales now at close to 720 lbs. She usually sits in a metal chair but on Christmas she busted out the concrete reinforced chair.  The chair weighted 250 pounds.

She spent two straight hours eating her Christmas dinner.  The single mother-of-two ripped into two 35lb turkeys, two maple-glazed hams, 25lbs of potatoes (15 lbs roast, 10lbs mashed), seven loaves of bread, nine pounds of herb stuffing, four pints of gravy, four pints of cranberry dressing and an astonishing 30lbs of vegetables.

And she didn’t even break a sweat.

Donna’s ate50,000 calories in her two-hour Christmas feast — as much as many people eat over the course of three weeks.

After polishing off her enormous main course, she still had plenty of room for dessert and ate a ‘salad’ made of marshmallow, cream cheese, whipped cream and cookies.

Donna’s two children, Devin, 14, and Jacqueline, three, enjoyed a more modest feast. The 5’2 Donna defended her big fat meal, saying: ‘I eat as much as I want, whenever I want but at this time of year I really go all out.

Donna, who insists she is healthy, told WWN:  “People who feel guilty about eating are hilarious. And stupid.  Thin people are stupid.”  She said she has started a non-profit organization that helps fight anorexia, bulimia and supports women who want to become morbidly obese.  “All our members have the same goal:  we want to be forklifted out of our house.”

Donna hopes to one day be the Guinness World Record holder for fattest woman. She is already on the books as the world’s fattest mother, having given birth to Jacqueline in 2007 when she weighed 576 pounds.

She makes a living from being fat, getting paid to make public appearances and keeping a website where people can pay to watch her eat.  Some even pay for a close up of her chewing.

WHAT SHE ATE
2 portions of 35lb oven roasted turkeys
2 portions of 25lb maple glazed hams
10lbs of roast potatoes
15lbs of mashed potatoes
15lbs of chopped carrots
5lbs of sweetcorn
5lbs of roasted butternut squash
15 parcels of house-baked bread
8 pints of cranberry relish
8 pints of home-made gravy
10 lbs of herbed stuffing
1 tray of mixed green salad including salad dressing.
CALORIE TOTAL: 50,000

Already a Guinness world record holder for being the largest woman to ever give birth, Donna hopes to gain 350 pounds more and officially become the fattest woman in the world.

She got the Guinness World Record as  the world’s fattest mother, when she gave birth in 2007 weighing 505 pounds.

She needed a team of 30 medics to deliver her daughter Jacqueline during a high-risk Caesarean birth.  Afterward, she bought each of the medics 200 hundred Big Macs.

Donna met Jacqueline’s father Philippe on a dating site for plus-size people, even though he weighed only 150 pounds.

He supported her 12,000-calorie a day diet and was a ‘belly man’ who loved her enormous shape.   Philippe is known as a Fat Belly Addict.

When she  was 19 she met her first husband, who worked as a chef at a steak restaurant. “He worked night shifts and would come home at 2 or 3am and bring the leftovers with him,’ she said.

We’d stay up and eat huge piles of steak, mashed potatoes, and gravy with butter. ‘I started gaining weight quickly and my husband liked it. ‘He said I was sexier when I was bigger, and I felt happier too.’

When she was 27, Donna weighed 300 pounds, and became pregnant with her eldest son, Devin. Her marriage ended soon after and she turned to food for comfort.

By the age of 31, she weighed 390 pounds and decided to try and lose weight. She lost 75 pounds in six months and was due to have a gastric band operation.

But just before she was due to go under the knife, her friend died during a similar operation.

‘That was a sign for me,’ she said. ‘I decided it just wasn’t worth it. I like being the way I am.’

Donna, then 400 pounds , came across a website which celebrated morbidly obese women.  When she admitted her real size, Donna was flooded with emails from men.

‘They sent me gifts through the post, like protein shakes to help me put on weight faster,’ she said.

And she’s unrepentant of her weight-gain goal, despite risking her own life in the process.

‘I love eating and people love watching me eat,’ she said.

‘It makes people happy, and I’m not harming anyone.’

NEW YORK, NY – David Letterman has come forward and admitted another affair, with the World’s Fattest Cat.

Letterman is currently at the heart of a scandal involving attempted blackmail.  David Letterman has come forward admitting to an affair in the late 90′s with Tonya the Worlds Fattest Cat.  Weekly World News has uncovered photos and details of their illicit affair.

The two met on Letterman’s show when Tonya was bringing several of her old ladies to do a Stupid Human Tricks segment.  The two hit it off backstage and began their illicit affair.  Due to the inter-species nature of their relationship they kept it a secret.  After tapings of his show, the two would meet for dinner around New York City. According to sources they would often go to a place in Chinatown that offered “all you can eat dumplings.”  Once they had finished a typically 6 hour romantic dinner, sources say they would make passionate love in the back of Letterman’s limousine.

With news becoming public recently David Letterman admitted publicly his affairs over the years.  Most shocking and unexpected was his affair with the World’s Fattest Cat.  Said Letterman of the incident “I’m not proud of what I did, but I don’t regret a moment of it.”

Tonya and her lawyers are in talks with the Lifetime Channel to have the story turned into a TV movie.

]]> http://weeklyworldnews.com/celebs/12344/david-letterman-affair/feed/ 5 Reginald Cunningham III david_lettermans_mistress http://weeklyworldnews.com/mutants/7746/forever-21-plus-size-line/ http://weeklyworldnews.com/mutants/7746/forever-21-plus-size-line/#comments Tue, 21 Apr 2009 14:37:54 +0000 Samuel T. Westbrook http://weeklyworldnews.com/?p=7746 ]]>

NEW YORK, NY – Fashion retailer Forever 21 debuted a new line of clothing for plus-sized women, along with the lines’ special consultant: Tonya, the World’s Fattest Cat!

Forever 21, known throughout the fashion world for its high style at low prices, decided to expand its repertoire into the plus sized market after being contacted by Tonya herself.

“We are rather ashamed to admit that we never really considered plus-sizes before,” Forever 21 founder Do-Won Chang told reporters at following a runway show of the line.  “When we started the company in the 80′s, everyone was only making fashionable clothing for skinny people.  We didn’t think heavier people were interested in looking good.”

“Tonya showed us the error of our thinking.  And now, I would like to introduce to you, Forever 21′s plus-sized line – Faith 21!”

Always a fan of high fashion, and a trendsetter in the fashion world herself, Tonya was reportedly disappointed at not being able to fit into a leopard print cardigan with matching skort she saw at the Union Square location of Forever 21 while on a shopping spree for Spring fashions.

“Tonya loves a good cardigan-skort combo,” said her spokeswoman at the debut event.  “She was heartbroken when she realized there wasn’t a single plus-sized item in the entire store.”

“She immediately abandoned the rest of the shopping itinerary and dictated a strong-worded e-mail of disappointment to Forever 21.”

The letter must have struck a chord within Forever 21 because within a matter of days, Susan De La Fontaine Delacroix, head designer and visionary for the company, personally contacted Tonya.

“Her letter was very inspiring, not only emotionally but creatively,” Delacroix told the crowd prior to the runway show.  “I immediately started sketching, designing, and sewing.  Many of those initial creations you are about to see today.”

“That was the first step, the next was to get Tonya on board.  She was already my muse, but I needed her to be the face of Faith 21.”

Delacroix is so confidant in Tonya’s ability as the line’s exclusive spokeswoman, she believes the fashion world is about to be turned on its head.

“These clothes are so hot, and Tonya is so hot in these clothes, I know that skinny girls are going to try to put on some extra pounds so they can fit into Faith 21.  Because Faith 21 is exclusive.  We are not making mini-versions for the regular line, and not just making jumbo versions of the regular Forever 21 line for Faith 21.  Its completely different.”

“Mark my words.  By this time next year, every model walking down the runway will be Tonya-sized.”

LOS ANGELES, CA – Partnering with Stevie Nicks and The ShamWOW Guy, Tonya, the World’s Fattest Cat, is debuting a revolutionary exercise tool to shake off unwanted weight!

Premiering on local access channels statewide this week during the 1:37am timeslot, Tonya along with Nicks and Vince Schlomi, the ShamWOW spokesman, presented The Power Plate.  The device, looking like a mix between a treadmill and a teleportation station, promises to shed fat, build muscle tone, and increase bone density in just 10 minutes a day.

All through the power of a revolutionary vibration technology.

Stevie Nicks, lead singer of Fleetwood Mac and longtime friend and confidant of Tonya, has secretly been using The Power Plate to drop 60 pounds in preparation for the devices debut and her own world tour.

“Tonya and I were approached by scientists from Ohio State University who developed the vibration technology utilized by The Power Plate,” Nicks said during the products infomercial.

“Always on the lookout for innovative and fun ways to stay healthy and lean, Tonya and I decided we would love to give it a try and if we liked it, be the spokeswomen.”

“And just look at these amazing results!” Nicks said as she spread her arms wide, displaying both her trademark angel wing sleeves as well as her new svelt frame.

Criticism of the device has come primarily from skeptics who have yet to actual test out the new technology.

“Sitting, standing, or working out on a machine that simply shakes you cannot possibly add anything to your exercise,” Suzanne Somers, spokeswoman for the Thigh Master and alleged arch-enemy of Stevie Nicks, wrote on her blog.

Despite the naysayers, the product appears to be an early success.

“We sold nearly 25% of our stock in the first 4 days on the air!” Nicks told reporters in a written statement.  “We aim to move our sales efforts to prime time with the help of veteran salesman Vince Schlomi.”

“Vince knows how to take a hard to believe product and demonstrate how its a must have around the home.”

“Between my results, Vince’s salesmanship, and Tonya’s star power, its only a matter of time before The Power Plate is in every home in America!”

“And before you know it, people worldwide will be shaking their fat right off!”

LOS ANGELES, CA – During a tumultuous weekend, starlet Lindsay Lohan let loose a torrent of anger on her Twitter account. What caused this outburst? Ronson has gone astray!

Last week, the LA police department issued an arrest warrant for Lohan, stemming from a 2007 arrest for a DUI and hit-and-run. She also got into a vicious fight with her girlfriend, Samantha Ronson, Saturday afternoon, while a crowd of paparazzi and cops sat outside.

Very early that morning,  a “tweet” on Lohan’s Twitter account, stated the following confusing message:

should you end it if the one person in the world fails to love, hold/comfort, apologize, and CHERISH you the night before jail? LIARS R COWARDS cuz they don’t know what they got til it is far gone. and people-if you fucking love someone. PUT UR PRIDE A-f***ing-SIDE AND JUST LOVE THEM BACK! do not ever dj before calling if they ARE F***ING ABOUT TO GET ARRESTED FOR CHASING YOU TO MAKE YOU STAY

What triggered this breakdown? Weekly World News sources have now confirmed that Ronson was spotted at her DJ gig that same evening, getting frisky with Tonya, the World’s Fattest Cat!

A close friend said, “Word got back to Lindsay pretty quickly about Sam’s new ‘acquaintance’. She went ballistic! She spends so much time dieting and watching her weight, and then Sam turns around and starts eyeing up big girls?”

Tonya is well-known for being addicted to the spotlight. She has romanced Ricky Gervais and Daniel Craig, appeared on “Deal or No Deal” and “Jon and Kate Plus 8”, and even leant support to big girls Oprah and Jessica Simpson. But stealing another woman’s woman? “This is an all new low for Tonya,” said the source.

Ronson had reportedly promised Tonya that she would DJ the Meow Mix Benefit for Feline Obesity, but it’s doubtful Lohan will let her off the short leash any time soon.

PEMBROKE PINES, FL – Following a charity concert that served a buffet of criticism over her appearance, Jessica Simpson has turned to an old friend for support – Tonya!

The country-pop starlet has made her name on being a more wholesome alternative to her skin-flashing peers, but that has not stopped Simpson from playing up her looks and features.  The media and audience members alike took notice during the charity event that there seemed to be more of Simpson, and more undercover than usual.

“Now, I’m not one to make fun of people, or kick them when they’re down,” gossip columnist Perez Hilton said in a blog post.  “So all I’m going to say, all I’m going to point out, is that she had to wear two belts at that show.  Two Belts.  Two.”

Simpson reportedly took the blog post and media attention very hard.  She had her mother place a call to Tonya, the World’s Fattest Cat, an old friend of the Simpsons.

“Tonya could not be more pleased that Jessica looked to her for advice,” Tonya’s spokeswoman said in a statement to reporters in Florida.  “There is no one that has gotten more publicity, both good and bad, about her weight and size than Tonya.  She is the perfect person to help Jessica through this private time.”

Tonya spent several hours with Jessica and her mother watching a screener of “Nights in Rodanthe” and eating low-fat diet Healthy Choice Rocky Road ice cream.

“It was a relaxing and fun night,” Tonya said through her spokeswoman.  “I told Jessica that she is as beautiful as ever, no matter what people might be saying about her.  She should never be ashamed of her looks or body and she should never let people make her feel bad about herself.”

“I told her ‘Big is Beautiful!’  ‘Fat is All That!’ and The Bigger the Better!’  We toasted with an Root Beer float.”

LOS ANGELES, CA – Following a New Year’s telethon for pets in need, Tonya The World’s Fattest Cat had a falling out with co-host Ricky Gervais.

Gervais has come under fire this week for comments he made on the telethon and in recent stand-up routines about “fat people” that some people think are going too far.

Calling overweight people “lazy pigs,” Gervais has asserted that obesity is a choice.  On the show, Gervais held up a 4-month-old Siamese kitten looked at Tonya and said, “Before I met you, I never knew these came in triple extra large.”

Tonya’s handlers abruptly entered a shot and declared, “Ricky Gervais doesn’t care about fat people.”

On his blog, Gervais responded to allegations of hate-mongery, claiming, “Of course I care about fat people!  I’m a fatty; most of England is fatties and many Americans too.   As long as they keep supporting me, I will support them.  And all nine of their chins.”

Gervais said he tried reaching out to Tonya to make amends.

Through her Twitter page, Tonya replied, “Sunday 4:17pm: Totally ignoring his calls.  Not letting him ruin my ham and cheese break.”  As well as, “Monday 8:39am: Not returning that email.  Paws full of spam.”

“I know what she’s doing here: playing hard to get,” Gervais said on his blog.  “She thinks the longer she avoids me, the more intently I’ll pursue her.  I wish I could say its not working.  But it is!”

“Now I don’t just want her forgiveness, I want her.  She’s made me fall in love with a fatty!”

CHICAGO, IL – In the latest issue of O Magazine, Oprah reveals that during years of struggling with rollercoaster weight gain/loss she had one consistent shoulder to lean on – Tonya’s!

As one of the most powerful women in the world and the most influential woman in American media and culture, Oprah’s battle with her weight has always been public on her show and in her magazine.

For the first time, Oprah reveals that Tonya, the World’s Fattest Cat, has been her behind-the-scenes support force all these years.

“People think that having a successful TV show and magazine means that you feel successful and are a happy person,” Oprah says in the article.  It’s not that simple.  Food is my Achilles’ heel and weight gain is my punishment.”

“Without Tonya by my side, I don’t know how I would have gotten through it all.  There were times when I wanted to fall off the wagon, I had lost 40 or 50 pounds and just wanted to eat a Twinkie.  10 Twinkies, actually.  Would Tonya let me eat those 10 Twinkies?  No, she wouldn’t.  She ate them herself.  Not because she’s fat.  Because that’s what a friend does.  They eat the Twinkie so you don’t.”

The article also reveals for the first time information regarding the years-long disappearance of Tonya in the late 1990s.

Oprah says, “Tonya supports me because she knows what its like to fluctuate dramatically in her weight.  She went on a diet once that resulted in her losing hundreds of pounds very quickly, making her look like just another normal house cat.  In her shame, she went into hiding and spent years binging to get her weight back up.”

“It was very hard on her, but I was there for her, feeding her my Twinkies, both real and metaphorically.”

PHILADELPHIA, PA – Jon and Kate Gosselin, stars of the hit reality show, Jon and Kate Plus 8, have added one supersized mouth to their family this holiday season: Tonya!

The parents of eight children, 7-year-old twin girls and 4 year-old sextuplets, caved to the increasing pressure of their children to adopt a pet.  Originally expecting to get a medium to large sized dog, the Gosselin’s changed their plans after being introduced to Tonya at a summit for reality TV show stars.

“Jon looked over and saw Tonya being interviewed by at least 6 different reporters at one time,” Kate said in a press release, “he immediately knew that if she could handle that many members of the press, she could totally deal with eight screaming, grabby children.”

When asked about their decision to adopt a giant cat instead of a dog, Jon told reporters, “We hadn’t considered a cat originally.  Size was very important to us.  Having eight kids, we knew we wanted an animal that all of them could pay attention to at the same time.  The problem with a cat or rabbit or small dog is that only one kid could hold it or pet it.  With Tonya, that isn’t going to be a problem.  When she lays on her back, all six of the little kids can lay on Tonya with room to spare.”

Longtime fans of Tonya’s who have followed her recent performances on Top Chef and Biggest Loser, were surprised to hear that she is taking a break from reality competitions to guest star on the much tamer TLC show.

Through her spokesperson, Tonya responded, “If you have ever seen the program, you know that Kate knows how to cook big meals.  And we all know Tonya loves big meals.  She also loves a challenge.  And being manhandled by 16 little sticky hands just might be the most challenging thing Tonya has ever done.”

Rumors that Tonya is actually only interested in eating the young Gosselin children have been widely disputed.  Both Tonya’s representation and TLC have promised defamation of character lawsuits to “anyone who continues to spread such vile accusations.”

STAMFORD, CT – Tonya, the World’s Fattest Cat, debuted a new entrée just in time for Thanksgiving. Tonya co-hosted the Martha Stewart Thanksgiving Special with the world-renowned homemaker and chef earlier this week, and made a culinary surprise.

Turbaconducken, the next stage in entrée meat fusion, combines the Thanksgiving favorite turducken with delicious bacon.  Turducken, a chicken stuffed into a duck stuffed into a turkey is then wrapped entirely in bacon.

“Up until yesterday, I thought turducken was the perfect Thanksgiving entrée,” Stewart said during the program.  “It just goes to show that even after being a homemaker for over 50 years, a fat cat can still teach this old dog new tricks.”

Samples of the turbaconducken were a huge success with the audience members in attendance at the taping, although there was not much to go around.

Shortly after the turbaconducken came out of the oven, Tonya became noticeably agitated and excited.

“She began purring incessantly and rubbed her face against the counter top,” Producer Jason Grefth said.  “Before Martha could react and save the turbaconducken, Tonya unhinged her jaw and swallowed the 40 pound entrée whole.”

Producers managed to pull a bacon-covered leg from Tonya’s mouth before she had a chance to swallow.

Audience members fought over pieces of the drool-glazed, bacon encrusted leg.