PETA, the animal rights group, will be producing XXX porn videos – so they can reach more people.

PETA plans to conquer the porn world – and they doing it for the animals.

“We live in a 24 hour news cycle world and pornography has proven to be  the most effective way to reach certain individuals – most individuals,” said PETA spokeswoman Raja Lindsey.

“Porn watchers are usually big meat eaters, so we want to make vegan porn,” Lindsey continued.

The porn videos will persuade the horny and the hot that veganism is superior,” said Lindsey. “We really want to grab people’s attention, get them to question the status quo and ultimately take action, because the best way we can help the greatest number of animals is simply by not eating them.”

PETA says that eating less meat is better for you health, and makes you a “dynamo” in bed.

PETA will talk about the un-ethical treatment of animals in every porn video they make.  Here’s a quote from the V Monologues.  V for vegan.

“Chickens have their sensitive beaks seared off with a hot blade, and male cattle and pigs are castrated without any painkillers.”

With the finer details still to be finalized, PETA did confirm that regular people, not just porn stars, will also be featured in the porn videos.

“There will be a lot of girl on girl  content, but we haven’t ruled out ‘celebrity on non-celebrity’ content as well” said Lindsey.

“People who are extraordinarily dedicated to helping animals and who are willing to do whatever it takes to draw attention to the suffering they endure – they will be allowed to part of our ‘threesome’ series.”

PETA has done ad campaigns with adult film stars Sasha Grey, Ron Jeremy and Jenna Jameson. In 2008, the organization’s YouTube account was shut down after posting porn videos of celebrities.

PETA also is trying to become sponsors of the soon-to-be releases sex tape of Kim Kardashian.

BROOKLYN, NY – The Beastie Boys held a secret show in their hometown, and a certain beastly boy was on hand to collaborate.

One of the longest-lived hip hop acts, the Beastie Boys originally started as a punk band but was shaped by famous producer Rick Rubin into a three-man rap crew. They found critical and financial success with hits “So What’cha Want”, “Sabotage” and “Intergalactic”, all of which they performed at their surprise concert at the Music Hall of Williamsburg last night.

During their final song, “Fight For Your Right”, Ad-Rock spotted the one and only Bat Boy head banging in the front row and pulled him on stage. His contribution mainly consisted of shrieking into the microphone, coincidentally harkening back to the band’s hardcore phase.

Bat Boy was so excited he offered them chocolate-covered mosquitoes after the show, but the Boys declined as Mike D. is now vegan.