WASHINGTON, DC — The Vice President is out $800,000 after he fell for a well-known Internet scam.

MOSCOW – Last night there were mysterious floating red lights over Moscow.

GENEVA – The Jetpack story broken here on WWN continues to generate controversy!

NEW YORK – The United Nations has formed a panel to begin peace talks with aliens.

FRANCE – Carla Bruni is back in the news. WWN first revealed that Bruni was immortal and was far beyond your mere first lady. Stay-tuned as more will follow tomorrow!

GENEVA – A consensus vote at the United Nations today recognized Kosovo’s right to after-hours, unsupervised socialization rights with consenting nations.

SVALBARD, NORWAY – Reports have emerged claiming that Cindy McCain, wife of Republican Presidential nominee John McCain, will return to her ice kingdom following the November elections should her husband not be victorious.