Tag Archive | "twilight"

DAKOTA FANNING POSES FOR PLAYBOY

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LOS ANGELES – Dakota Fanning, who turns 18 on February 23rd, 2012, has reportedly done a photo spread for Playboy!

“TWILIGHT” CAUSES BRAIN SEIZURES

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PEORIA – The latest movie in the popular ‘Twilight’ franchise is reportedly triggering brain seizures in audiences across the country.

VAMPIRE KILLS RUSSIAN LIVESTOCK

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NOVOSIBIRSK – A vampire has been killing millions of goats in Russia.

SUPERMOON!

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On March 19, 2011 the world will change as we know it.

X-FILES TO GO GAY

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LOS ANGELES – David Duchovny wants to make a third X-Files movie and wants to take it in a new direction. The X-Files is going gay!

STUDY: 1 IN 5 AMERICAN TEENS IS A VAMPIRE

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A new Pew Research Poll reveals that 19% of American teens are vampires.

KRISTEN STEWART IS TOTALLY TEAM ALIEN

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Bella may prefer Edward to Jacob, but when it comes to Kristen Stewart, she’s Team Alien all the way.

WAL-MART GANG

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PORT SAINT LUCIE, FL – Gangs are springing up in Wal-Marts around the country, but shoppers continue to risk it in search of good deals.

CHENEY COMES OUT OF THE COFFIN

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WASHINGTON, DC – Vice President Dick Cheney has announced that he is a Vampire. Holding a press conference in the hours before dawn, Cheney stated, “I am an Undead-American.”

BAT BOY LINES UP TO MEET ‘TWILIGHT’ STAR

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PHILADELPHIA, PA – Whether he’s a fan of the books or just trying to make friends, Bat Boy was spotted waiting in line to meet the star of the upcoming film “Twilight”.