BLAGO JURORS WIN POWERBALL LOTTERY
CHICAGO – On the same night jurors acquitted former Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich of all but one charge, they won the $64 million Powerball lottery.
Tag Archives: rahm emanuel
BOZO THE PRESS SECRETARY
WASHINGTON – Following the advice of Rep. Alan Grayson (D-FL), President Obama fired Robert Gibbs and hired… Bozo.
SEIU TO UNIONIZE LEMONADE STANDS
PEORIA, IL – Federal authorities are helping SEIU unionize lemonade stands across the country.
OBAMA TO DEPORT 15 MILLION REPUBLICANS
DALLAS, TX – Secretary of Homeland Security, Janet Napolitano, announced the White House’s plan to deport 15 million Republicans to Mexico.
BAT BOY PUT IN CHARGE OF U.S. CYBER COMMAND
BREAKING – Washington, D.C. The White House announced this morning that they will be putting Bat Boy in charge of the newly created “Perfect Citizen” cyber program.
HOUSE HEALTH CARE BILL
WASHINGTON, DC – Democrats finally presented the health care reform bill yesterday and then celebrated into the early hours this morning.
OBAMA TOWN HALL WEBCAM
WASHINGTON, DC – Obama made history yesterday by holding a national online town hall. Unfortunately the tech savvy president still forgot to turn off the webcam when he was done.
OBAMA APPOINTEE CURSE
WASHINGTON, DC – Charles Freeman has withdrawn from consideration as National Intelligence Chair. Another appointee is claimed by the Obama Curse.
RAHMBO VS BLAGO
CHICAGO, IL – Sources inside the Obama Transition Team have confirmed that Rahm Emanuel tipped off FBI to Governor Rod Blagojevich’s schemes as payback.
