WASHINGTON – US trades the comedian, Carrot Top, for a truck load of Canadian pennies.

I’m madder than a footman with an ingrown toenail!

LONDON – During President Obama’s first meeting with Queen Elizabeth II, he presented her with a gift: an iPhone filled with tokens of American culture.

I’m pig biting mad about Teddy Kennedy getting knighted by the Queen! Can you believe it? Now we’ll have to call that bloated old fraud “Sir”! “Sir Slab of Lard,” maybe.