CHICAGO, IL – In the wake of President Elect Barack Obama’s speech, Obatma took to the stage to make his own announcement.

Chicago residents were elated to see Senator Obama’s half-bat half-brother make an impromptu appearance following Obama’s victory speech.

Only able to squeak and squeal, Obatma used an interpreter to congratulate his half-brother on his well-earned success after a twenty month long presidential campaign. Obatma recognized the groundbreaking achievement this was for African Americans everywhere.

As such, he has decided to take up the underdog torch and run in the 2012 elections to be the first mutant American president!

The crowd was so taken with his speech that they politely ignored when he skipped off the stage, snatching mosquitoes and stuffing them in his mouth.

]]> http://weeklyworldnews.com/mutants/3705/obatma-2012/feed/ 0 Hideaki Tailor obatmarally http://weeklyworldnews.com/celebs/3623/mckainye-clothing-line/ http://weeklyworldnews.com/celebs/3623/mckainye-clothing-line/#comments Mon, 03 Nov 2008 09:49:26 +0000 wwnjustinyork http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/?p=3623 ]]>

CHICAGO, IL – Shocking both the hip-hop and the political worlds, Kanye West and John McCain announced that they have developed a joint clothing line.

The gear, called McKainye, will be a blend of conservative styles typically associated with politicians, the free-spirited styles typically associated with hip-hop artists, and the narcissistic feel that’s unique to Kanye West.  “McKainye – Reaching Way Across the Aisle,” is both the tag line for the apparel and the title to the duet the pair recorded to promote their new venture.

Making the merger even more bizarre, West has been vocal against the current Republican administrations.  The rapper/philanthropist made headlines in 2005 during a benefit show for victims of Hurricane Katrina by going off script and saying “George Bush doesn’t care about black people.”

“McCain’s good people,” said West.  “He’s no Bush.  This is the right thing for the country right now.”

McCain couldn’t be contacted for a comment, as he’s still very busy with his bid to become the next president of the United States.  There is no support to the charge that McCain has been throwing the election in order to promote the apparel and eventually record a solo album.

McKainye will hit the stores in mid-November of this year.

DALLAS, TX – Republican presidential nominee John McCain announced Monday he will suspend his campaign yet again in order to upgrade his cybernetic systems. Sources say he hopes to appear more passably human before the final debate.

McCain’s need for an upgrade comes as no surprise to many insiders.  During the Oct 7th debate his GPS systems were noticeably damaged, causing him to wander aimlessly for much of the evening.

Last month investigators discovered that John McCain had many of his internal organs replaced with cybernetic systems.  Doctors believe his extensive cybernetic infrastructure is the only thing giving him a one in four chance of survival for the next seven years.

Glitches in the Arizona senator’s operating system became most apparent in Dallas when he answered an economic question by engaging his loafer-jets and repeatedly flying headfirst into a wall.  After a quick reboot the senator apologized and went on to talk about tax cuts.

The McCain campaign hopes an upgrade before the Oct. 15th debates will help the senator, who has been behind in polls for weeks, appear more modern and life-like.  GOP cyborg specialist Dennis Fiorino said “Our candidate will receive the most up-to-date software for dealing with twenty-first century problems.  After his Vista upgrade, he will be the best equipped to lead our nation.”