LAS VEGAS, NV – President-Elect Obama’s streak of intergalactic bad luck continues this week as the Installation Commander of Area 51 refused to hand over the keys.

Earlier in the week it was reported that the Obama Transition Team has been clashing with NASA over the qualifications of representatives assigned to work with the organization.

Obama traveled to Las Vegas yesterday to create space between his Transition Team and the investigation into embattled Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich.

Under the cloak of a quick gambling trip, Obama slipped away to the top-secret military installation.

While the United States government and military has never confirmed the existence of aliens and UFOs at Area 51, Weekly World News has reported the facts for years.

Unconfirmed reports explain that the President-Elect arrived outside Area 51 sometime between four and six in the morning and spent at least 45 minutes attempting to gain access to the facility.

A Weekly World News hidden microphone picked up fragments of the conversation between Obama and the military personnel.

President-Elect Obama was heard saying, “Aw, come on!  This is the whole reason I ran for President!  Give me the keys, already!”

It is believed that after his inauguration, in addition to the black book of nuclear codes, Obama will finally receive a set of keys to Area 51.

WASHINGTON, DC – President-Elect Obama asserted influence this weekend, advising President Bush on which holiday choir to pick for the White House – and they’re aliens!

The Qwoak Intergalactic Boys Choir, famous for their recent holiday albums “I Saw Mommy Kissing Frozen Santa Claus” and “Rudolph the Twelve Nosed Reindeer,” have been performing choral choirs around the country.

After seeing the QIBC perform at Old Orchard Shopping Center in Skokie, Illinois, the President-Elect decided they were perfect for the White House.  The fact that the decision is not yet up to him did not seem to be of significance.

In a not so subtle move, the President-Elect went on Meet The Press Sunday morning and said how he intends to return the White House to the people by inviting artists, poets and musicians as well as school children and the public at large to use the White House as a tool for advancement of culture and art.

At the same time, Rahm Emmanuel, Obama’s Chief of Staff, was on the phone with current White House staff to get the Qwoak Intergalactic Boys Choir to be brought on as the official White House Choir this holiday season.

“The President-Elect is committed to using the White House as a platform for advancing and bettering the American culture,” Emmanuel said.   “What better way to do that then by introducing Americans to the most talented artists, not just from America, not just from Earth, but the entire galaxy.”

CHICAGO, IL – President-Elect Barack Obama has gone a step further in diversifying his transition team.

So far, Obama has named a number of openly gay people and people of color to his transition team. The team was created to lay out the agenda and priorities for the upcoming Obama Administration. Minority groups have applauded his efforts, but one group was left out until now.

Obama has been in talks to hire Xaxal, a well-known alien rights activist in the extraterrestrial community. His expertise alien-human relations makes him an exceptional candidate for one of the Agency Review teams. These teams provide the president-elect with information needed to make strategic policy, budgetary, and personnel decisions prior to the inauguration.

President George W. Bush has all but ignored even bringing alien rights to the table for the past eight years. Many extraterrestrials living in the United States are now looking to President-Elect Obama to make radical policy changes.

When pressed to explain at a recent press conference, Obama simply stated, “Look, I’ve known Xaxal for a long time. He attended Ykard University, the galactic sister school of Harvard Law, and has defended minority rights on 27 different planets in the last 300 years. If anyone else is more qualified in alien issues than him, I’d like to meet them!”

The reporter replied that the President-Elect had already met Cindy McCain, who had alleged relations with the Alien, but Obama quickly moved on to the next question.

CHICAGO, IL – President-Elect Barack Obama will soon be appointing members to his cabinet, and insiders are predicting one surprising addition.

While it is still early yet, speculations have already begun on who Obama will be selecting to join his presidential cabinet in January 2009. Names like John Kerry, Caroline Kennedy, Colin Powell and Bill Richardson have been bandied about, but one name in particular stands out: Obatma.

When asked about the possibility at a brief press conference, Obama explained, “Look, I want to clarify, this would not be an act of nepotism. Obatma is an intelligent, cool-headed mutant, wise beyond his years.

“If he were ready, willing and able to take the position, I would happily make him the Commissioner of my newly created Bureau of Mutant Affairs.”

Obatma was unavailale for comment, as he is currently in the swamps of Gallatin County taking a well-earned break from campaigning for Obama.