LAS VEGAS, NV – President-Elect Obama’s streak of intergalactic bad luck continues this week as the Installation Commander of Area 51 refused to hand over the keys.

WASHINGTON, DC – President-Elect Obama asserted influence this weekend, advising President Bush on which holiday choir to pick for the White House – and they’re aliens!

CHICAGO, IL – President-Elect Barack Obama has gone a step further in diversifying his transition team.

CHICAGO, IL – President-Elect Barack Obama will soon be appointing members to his cabinet, and insiders are predicting one surprising addition.