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WORLD’S FATTEST CAT ADOPTED
PHILADELPHIA, PA – Jon and Kate Gosselin, stars of the hit reality show, Jon and Kate Plus 8, have added one supersized mouth to their family this holiday season: Tonya!
BAT BOY LINES UP TO MEET ‘TWILIGHT’ STAR
PHILADELPHIA, PA – Whether he’s a fan of the books or just trying to make friends, Bat Boy was spotted waiting in line to meet the star of the upcoming film “Twilight”.
CHAOS CLOUD SETTLES IN FLORIDA
JACKSONVILLE, FL – It looks like the Chaos Cloud has picked its final destination before the elections begin: Florida!
CHAOS CLOUD MOVES TO PENNSYLVANIA
PHILADELPHIA, PA – Once again, the Chaos Cloud has shifted its sights and has settled over the City of Brotherly Love.
SARAH PALIN HEALS CHILD
TACONY, PA – At a recent campaign stop in northeast Philadelphia, Governor Sarah Palin used her spiritual powers to heal a young child.
SUPER-SARAH PALIN KNOCKS OUT JOE-TOX
I was as happy as Joe Biden at a Hair Club for Men conference to see Sarah Palin crush Joe Biden in the VP debate last week. Sarah had me at “Hey, can I call you Joe?” It didn’t help that Joe-Tox had a look of surprise frozen on his face from the Botox and his recent eyelift.
Amish Use Zombies for Labor
“The town was filled with zombies, and the Jenkins needed their barn raised. Seemed like the natural thing to do.”
