LOS ANGELES – Harry Potter and Osama Bin Laden have an eerie link.

NEW YORK – Minutes after President Obama’s speech, Donald Trump has demanded to see Osama Bin Laden’s Death Certificate!

WASHINGTON – Federal authorities have confirmed that Chuck Norris, working with the CIA, was the man killed Osama Bin Laden!

WASHINGTON – The U.S. military has released pictures of Osama Bin Laden’s compound. The U.S. was surprised to learn that Osama was a hoarder!

WASHINGTON – The FDA issued a product recall for several products made by the Indiana based company, Candy Dynamics.

INDIA – An important ruling was handed down today regarding disputed land. The verdict: the land goes to Obama!

GAINESVILLE, FL – Preacher Terry Jones changes his mind and announces “Kick A Moron Day.”

Pakistani Taliban’s leader alive according to his twitter account.

KARACHI – A video of the burnt body of a four-inch “alien” has been circulating on the Internet. Is it real?

NEW YORK, NY – Researchers have been using satellite-aided georgaphical analysis to pinpoint Osama bin Laden’s location, but he may be closer than they think.