NEW YORK, NY – A new club has been formed that requires a massive bank account – but it’s all for a good cause!

Dozens of U.S. billionaires are opening up their wallets and giving away their money to charity. With one simple word – “Yes” – these billionaires are agreeing to give up to half of their wealth to The Giving Pledge. The creation of Warren Buffett and Bill Gates, The Giving Pledge is a philanthropic campaign that is slowly gaining hefty donations.

The list is impressive and based on Forbes magazine’s estimates of the billionaires’ wealth, at least $150 billion could be given away.

Among the rich joining the campaign are New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg, media moguls Barry Diller and Red Turner, Oracle co-founder Larry Ellison, “Star Wars” movie maker George Lucas and energy tycoon T. Boone Pickens.

Buffet and Gates put their master plan into effect in June and since then they have enlisted the aid of 40 of the richest people in the United States. The two masterminds, with the help of Gates’ wife, have spoken to about 20 percent of the wealthiest people in the U.S. in hopes of persuading them to give away their fortunes.

“In most cases we had reason to believe that the people already had an interest in philanthropy,” Buffett said. “It was a very soft sell but 40 have signed up.”

“We’re looking forward to enlisting many of these 40 to go out and make some calls also so we can report an even greater milestone but we’re off to a terrific start,” he said.

The campaign asks U.S. billionaires to give away at least half their wealth during their lifetime or after their death, and to publicly state their intention with a letter explaining their decision. The Giving Pledge does not accept money but asks billionaires to make a moral commitment to give their fortunes to charity.

NEW YORK, NY – Following three years of repair, the USS Intrepid’s return to Manhattan was greeted by the Tri-State Area’s only known Kraken.

The decommissioned WWII battleship returns to its dock, reopening the Intrepid Sea, Air, and Space Museum. Spectators were delighted as the Battleship approached the city, and even more surprised when Grakkle the Kraken emerged in dramatic fashion sending waves crashing over the Intrepid.

Executive Director of the Intrepid Museum, Susan Marenoff commented, “It was such a pleasure to have Grakkle rise in honor of the Intrepid’s return. We had no idea he was in the area, or a fan of the museum. We’re hoping to have him participate in an upcoming exhibition on the role of US Warships in the Kraken-Great Squid Battle of 1948.”

Viewers were treated to a nautical display not seen in recent decades. While Grakkle was once a common site along the coast of Manhattan, Coney Island, and the Long Island Sound, he been much more reclusive as of late.

“I was delighted to see two of New York City’s treasures together,” New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg told reporters, “but my fear is that the rise of Grakkle is a portent for something brewing under the waters of New York. We really cannot afford another Kraken outlash against our trade ships. Not in this economy.”

NEW YORK, NY – New York City’s Mayor Michael Bloomberg is gearing up for a run at a third term in office.  He’s making the usual rounds of fundraisers and kissing babies to drum up support.  But in the wake of the failing financial institutions, Bloomberg needed a big hook to get New Yorkers on his side. So, today, in a private ceremony, Bloomberg officially issued the civic edict changing the name of Manhattan’s most famous street.

“The presidential candidates were right: Main Street IS more important than Wall Street. So I woke up this morning and decided to officially change the name Wall Street to Main Street,” said Bloomberg.  No New Yorkers seem to have noticed the change.