LAS VEGAS – Tragedy struck Kim Kardashian last night on a private flight from New Jersey to Las Vegas. Her left butt cheek exploded.

KONA, HAWAII – WWN has confirmed that Megan Fox married her longtime love Brian Austin Green on June 24th. WWN also confirmed that she is still a man.

ORLANDO – Operation Beautiful was launched to boost women’s self-esteem. Operation Big will do the same for men.

Sao Paolo, Brazil – Lea T, the famous Brazilian model, is in the midst of a sex change transition.

MALIBU – Surfers at Zuma Beach were shocked to see a mermaid, especially when the mermaid is Halle Berry!

Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid has decided to work for a male brothel in Nevada, part of a new campaign strategy “to serve all Nevada voters.”

Megan Fox met with Weekly World News reporters at her home in Los Angeles where she is doing publicity for her new film “Jennifer’s Body”. The internet is abuzz over nude scenes featuring the actress who was born a man.

BATON ROUGE, LA – Photographs were leaked yesterday from the set of the upcoming film “Jonah Hex.” The images confirm rumors that Megan Fox had four ribs removed for the role.