YUCATAN – Mayan scholars have updated their doomsday prophecy. The world will end in 2015, not 2012.Oops…. They made a mistake.   There’s good news for those that were fearing the 2012 Mayan apocalypse.   They counted wrong.   The world is not going to end in December 2012.  Instead, it’s going to end on September 3, 2015.   Update your daily planners!

A new critique, published as a chapter in the new textbook “Calendars and Years: Astronomy and Time in the Ancient and Medieval World” argues that the accepted conversions of dates from Mayan to the modern calendar are off.  This coupled with a new book, “We Are All Going To Die In 2015″ by Fritz Barnkopf  are rewriting the Mayan doomsday playbook that has been popularized in our culture over the last ten years.

The problem was discovered when researchers realized the Mayan calendar was converted to today’s Gregorian calendar using an erroneous calculation called the GMT constant, named for the last initials of three early Mayanist researchers.

But the GMT constant is completely bogus.  “The Mayan researchers of the past twenty years put too much stock in the GMT,” said Mayan expert Robert Wannamaker.  “They probably were chewing on too many cocoa leaves. The fact is that the GMT constant is 2 years and 271 days off.  We’ve proven that conclusively hear at The Scripps Institute.”

The apocalypse is now delayed.   This is a stunning blow to all the merchandisers that were seeking to capitalize on the “end-of-world” prophecy BEFORE the world ends.  “Man, I was selling all sorts of 2012 doomsday paraphernalia.   Now, I gotta go back and make it all again for 2015.  It’s a real drag,” said 2012 fanatic, Judd Barkley.

Hollywood is jumping right on the 2015 bandwagon.   Producers are lining up to make the 2012 sequel, 2015. “It’s great for us,” said Producer Tracey Barnham.  “I hope that they extended it again in a few years, so we can keep this franchise going.”

Not likely.  Mayan researchers are unanimous on the end-of-world data.  The world will disappear in 2015.  You might want to plan accordingly.

Bad news:  we’re all going to die.  Good news:  We got three more years!  Woo-hoo!!!

A 12,000 year old quartz crystal skull, which is believed to be an artifact from the Lost Continent of Atlantis, can heal the terminally ill.

So claimed Anna Mitchell-Hedges to Weekly World News, before her passing in 2007.

Many are familiar with crystal skulls from the most recent Indiana Jones films, Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. But few know they are based on a real artifact!

“This is truly a remarkable relic from a very ancient time in the world’s history,” said 81 year old Anna Mitchell-Hedges in 1993.

“It has absolutely incredible properties – properties for which, seemingly, there is no scientific explanation.

“In the more than half-century it’s been in my possession, time and time again I have watched in awe as the energy that apparently radiates from the skull has healed individuals who say they are terminally ill or permanently disabled.

“Among those who just want to touch the skull and meditate, some say they can feel its power surging right through their bodies – and they even catch glimpses of the future.”

The life-size skull, carved from quartz crystal, was discovered by Anna in 1921 while she and her adventurer father, F.A. Mitchell-Hedges, were excavating the ruins of the 1,500-year-old Mayan center of Lubaantun in Central America.

“I’ll never forget that magical moment when I first saw this awe-inspiring antique shimmering in the moonlight,” Anna said.

“I found it under a Mayan alter that had been covered by a collapsed wall. I was particularly struck by the fact that the lower jaw is movable. My father believed the Mayans may have used it as an oracle.”

However, he was also convinced that the Mayan hands had not fashioned the artifact, because such a detailed sculpture would require diamond tipped tools, since diamonds are the only material that can carve quartz crystal.

“And those kinds of tools just didn’t exist in that day and age,” Anna explained.

“Naturally, there are some skeptics who claim the skull is a fake,” she continued, “but scientists at the California labs of Hewlitt-Packard have estimated it’s about 12,000 years old.

“Now, the only advanced civilization we know of that may have existed that long ago is the fabled Lost Continent of Atlantis. This lost continent reportedly extended almost to the coast of Central America.”

After Ms. Mitchell-Hedges passed away in 2007, her friend Bill Homann inherited the skull. This past April,  the Smithsonian Institution examined it and also established it was made with tools the Mayans did not have. However, this led to their conclusion that it was made in late 1800s, rather than by a much earlier civilization.

There are additional theories about the skull, most prominently that they were either created by aliens or an ancient culture was shown how to create them by aliens.

Giorgio A. Tsoukalos, a proponent of ancient alien contact, discusses his take on the crystal skulls:

Bill Homann remains convinced of its authenticity. He is committed to building a museum in honor of the Mitchell-Hedges in Sedona, Arizona.

GUATEMALA – Archaeologists have unearthed large carved panels in the jungles of northern Guatemala, that seem to depict two beings surrounding a UFO!

The panels were dug up on the site of El Mirador, the largest known Mayan city ever excavated. Dr. Richard Hansen, the director of the Mirador Basin Project, dated the panels to around 300 BC, when the city was at its peak.

Dr. Hansen is speculating that the above panel is of the famous Hero Twins of Mayan mythology. One of the Twins is in possession of a decapitated head (on top of the right figure’s thigh), which is likely that of their beheaded father, Hun Hunahpu. The other figure has a headdress with jaguar features, identifying him as Xbalanque, which means “Young Jaguar Sun”.

However, while Mayan mythology and architecture is ripe with serpents and celestial deities, UFOlogists are certain these panels reference contact with extraterrestrials! They believe the two beings are not of this Earth, that their outfits are more technological than decorative, and could have acted as atmosphere transformers or translation tools. The item in the middle, if looked at from a tilt, appears to be a craft, with multiple protusions like a cockpit and landing gear.

Mayan culture has long been a focus for alien and UFO experts, due to their astronomy-heavy mythology and advanced mathematics understanding. The Ancient Astronaut theory attributes their knowledge to contact with extraterrestrials.