LOS ANGELES, CA – Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake are rumored to have broken up. Biel has since been seen on the arm of the Everglades’ most eligible bachelor: Manigator.

Seeking to further disrupt Town Hall health care meetings Republicans have sent in their secret weapon, Manigator!

NEW YORK, NY – Fox News stated yesterday that America is not pure since people marry “other species and ethnics.” Mutants around the country are now up in arms.

SARASOTA, FL – Jon and Kate Gosselin spent their 10th wedding anniversary apart last week. While Kate played with the children at their Pennsylvania home, Jon was at a bar in Florida, with Manigator.

THE EVERGLADES – Elusive cryptid Manigator has found himself in trouble yet again. The half-man half-alligator mutant is listed on DontDateHimGirl.com

FORT MYERS, FL – Levi Johnston and Bristol Palin, daughter of Governor Sarah Palin, have broken up. Now Bristol has recently been seen canoodling with notorious ex-con Manigator.

NEW ORLEANS, LA – After an altercation with police Monday night, the half-man half-alligator mutant Manigator has been banned from Tuesday’s Mardi Gras celebrations.

VICTORIA, BC – Pro wrestler Chris Jericho was assaulted after a match this weekend. It now seems Manigator, the half-man half-alligator mutant, started the fight.

CAPE CORAL, FL – An alligator was found trapped in a manhole, and mischievous mutant Manigator claims he had nothing to do with it.

BURLINGTON, VT – Over the holidays, Matt Dillon was arrested for driving 106mph in rural Vermont. His reason for doing so: “Manigator made me do it.”