HOLLYWOOD -  Casey Anthony settled on a $3 million deal to pose nude in Hustler.

Last Friday, Casey Anthony was offered $500,000 by Larry Flynt to pose naked in his magazine, Hustler.  Casey Anthony’s lawyer and BFF, Jose Baez, has made a deal with Flynt that will pay Casey $3 million for a full front spread.

King of the Hustler empire, Larry Flynt, said he was happy with the deal and was convinced that he would sell enough to recoup his investment.

“As part of the deal, Larry got Casey to agree to do a short XXX film with Jesse James,” said Hustler insider, Jonny Wadlow,  Casey agreed to it and the deal was done.

Flynt confirmed the deal the on HLN’s Nancy Grace, although Anthony’s camp quickly dismissed it.  Flynt explained that Casey is trying to keep a “low-profile” and will not admit to the deal in public until it hits the newsstands – sometime in October, 2011.

“Casey Anthony is heading to Palm Springs mid-August with our photographers – and Jesse James,” said Flynt.

Why Jesse James?  Well, Casey is now dating him.  READ ABOUT IT HERE.

The head Hustler honcho, said he initially did not consider Anthony as a model after a jury found her not guilty of killing little Caylee but changed his mind after being approached on a book tour by scores of horny men demanding he make America’s most hated mom an offer.

“You’ve got men who say hey, I want to see her in her birthday suit,” Flynt reportedly said. “There may be some sick individuals . . . but that’s what life is all about.”

Hugh Hefner recently told CNN’s Piers Morgan that he, too, has heard from several men who want to see Anthony nude in Playboy. Some guys really do have a type. And by “guys” I mean “sick bastards.”

Casey has hired celebrity trainer, Jillian Michaels, to get her in shape for the shoot – scheduled for August 15th.

LOS ANGELES – Larry Flynt and Hustler somehow got their hands on an Oprah sex tape and are going to release it!

Larry Flynt announced today that an “anonymous person” approached him with a secret sex tape of Oprah Winfrey.  The sex tape shows the talk show titan having sexual relations with an “unidentified person.”

Flynt would not reveal who Oprah was having sex with in the tape.

Outraged Oprah fans took to twitter immediately.  “This is disgusting.  Oprah is our Queen. You do NOT offend the queen,” said O-Lover on Twitter.

“Larry Flynt should arrested for doing this!”, said Oprahgoddess55 on Twitter.

Flynt said that he paid over $1 million dollars for the tape after it was verified with Hollywood Sex Tape Expert, Johnny Tribbles.

Tribbles has investigated hundreds of celebrity sextapes and is now the official authenticator of sex tapes before they can be released to the public.

“If Tribbles doesn’t authenticate, it isn’t real,” said Pamela Anderson.

Flynt is being tight-lipped about the Oprah sex tape, saying only that it was filmed in the last five years and the “scene” took place in Oprah’s house in Montecito, California.

He also said that Oprah has nothing to be embarrassed about:  “she looks fantastic in the tape and she is a world-class lover.”

There are rumors flying around the internet about who is on the sex tape with Oprah:  Stedman, Gayle King, Tom Cruise, Will Smith, Barack Obama or some say it’s Denzel Washington.  Some people are convinced this is the guy:

Oprah has made no comment on the sex tape.

WASHINGTON, DC – In one stunning move, Congress solved two crises plaguing America – a need for additional federal employees and a sinking pornography industry.

Pornography moguls Larry Flynt of Hustler Media and Joe Francis, Pulitzer Prize winning creator of the Girls Gone Wild series, have been lobbying Congress for bailouts similar to those given to the Automotive Industry and Wall Street.

“Porn has always been there to comfort Americans, to help them relax at the end of a busy day, and to take their mind off of their troubles,” Flynt and Francis said in a letter to Congress.  “Porn is the backbone of the American psyche.”

The media moguls asked Congress for five billion dollars to help keep production of pornography rolling while viewers are spending less on essential goods such as groceries, gas, and porn.

Congress decided to do one better for the pornography industry and the American people – take porn out of the bedroom and place it into the daily life of America in order to make people’s lives more enjoyable and relaxed.

“President-Elect Obama has said that he intends to add up to 10,000 new federal employees.  With so many people out of work, it wouldn’t be difficult to find workers to fill those rolls,” Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi said in a statement to the press.  “But when we were approached by Larry and Joe, we knew we had a unique opportunity to solve two problems at once.”

One of the first appointments was of Mariah Cherry, veteran of over 100 pornography films, as court reporter for the 1st Circuit Court of Appeals in Boston, Massachusetts.

“I was really nervous about my case going into appeals,” Marcus Blights, on trial for racketeering and extortion, said at the close of opening arguments.  “But I walked into court today and saw Ms. Cherry typing away.  She looked up, smiled and winked.  All my cares just slipped away.”

“At that moment, I couldn’t remember if I was guilty or innocent.  And I didn’t care.”