KENTUCKY – Country legend Loretta Lynn, 76, was released from a hospital, she didn’t have pneumonia, she had morning sickness!

Lynn was initially rushed to treatment in the early hours of the weekend, and has subsequently canceled several show dates. A

ccording to a statement on her official website, “Around 1:30 AM Saturday morning, Loretta awoke on her tour bus complaining that she was having a hard time breathing. They admitted her into a Bowling Green, Kentucky hospital where she was treated over the weekend for the beginning stages of bacterial pneumonia.”

But WWN has learned tonight – from Dr. Jeremy Brannon, head surgeon at the hospital – that Lynn was not suffering from pneumonia, she was suffering from morning sickness.  Loretta is pregnant again.

Loretta had four children before she was 19 and now that she is 76 (with several grandchildren) she thought she might be able to set a new kind of record and have a child after 75.    Like several other senior women, Loretta is using an artificial womb with sperm and egg donors.

Loretta is now back at her home in Hurricane Mills, Tennessee recovering; says Lynn, “It was one scary night… But I am feeling better and just gonna take it easy for a couple of weeks.”

The country music icon is beloved by her fans – and is an American treasure.  President Barack Obama, who appeared on Jay Leno tonight, wished her a speedy recovery – and a healthy, happy baby.  The baby, reportedly a girl, will be another Coal Miner’s Daughter Daughter.

Her rep confirms that she intends to make her next scheduled performance on Nov. 3 in Knoxville, Tenn.

Edgar Cayce (1877-1945), the “sleeping prophet” predicted the Japanese earthquake!

Edgar Cayce made a number of remarkably accurate predictions in his lifetime – and it was revealed yesterday that he had predicted the earthquake in Japan, saying it would happen in 2010 or 2011.

In 1934, Cayce predicted the beginning and end of World War II many years before it happened. He predicted the end of Communism, and that Russia would be born again. He also saw a strong religious movement coming out of Russia.

And he predicted natural disasters – including Hurricane Katrina and the earthquake in Japan.

Cayce believed that the Second Coming of Christ would happen before 2020 -probably in 2011 or 2012.  He gave a trance “reading” which described a number of quite unimaginable natural catastrophes that would occur at the beginning of the 21s century.

He predicted a  shift in the world’s axis in 2011.  The Japanese earthquake affected the earth’s axis on Friday, March  11.  Cayce felt this would eventually lead to:

* Inundations of many coastal regions, caused by a drop in the landmass of about 30 feet combined with a melting of both polar ice caps, including:

* The loss of much of England and Japan.

* The flooding of northern Europe, which will happen very rapidly.

*New land appearing off the east coast of North America, the so-called “rising of Atlantis”.

* The widespread destruction in Los Angeles, San Francisco and the destruction of Manhattan and disappearance of New York.

* Volcanic eruptions in tropical regions and an increase in Pacific volcanic activity in the Pacific Rim.

* A general warming of currently cool areas, and cooling of warm areas of the globe.

The rest of the world will also undergo wrenching change:

* “The greater portion of Japan must go into the sea.”

* “Northern Europe will be changed in the twinkling of an eye … many of the battlefields (Cayce was speaking in 1941) will carry on their trade with one another.”

* “The earth will be broken up in many places … there will be open waters in the northern portion of Greenland … new land in the Caribbean Sea … South America will be shaken from the uppermost portion to the end … and in the Antarctic off Tierra Del Fuego will be land and a strait with rushing waters.”

Cayce’s prophecies of geological upheaval hinge on the tilting of the earth’s axis. He saw that the shift would take place by the year 2001, causing drastic changes in climate. The signal for the shift will be the “breaking up of some conditions in the South Sea (South Pacific), and those as apparent in the rising of that which is almost opposite it, or in the Mediterranean.”

The climate reversals are clear: “… where there have been those (areas) of frigid or semitropical (nature) will become more tropical, and moss and fern will grow.”

Cayce referred to Atlantis some 700 times in his readings. The sleeping prophet placed the sunken land mass between the Gulf of Mexico and the Mediterranean Sea (it was just discovered in Southern Spain).  His readings indicate that the lost continent was destroyed by a series of man-made and natural cataclysms between 12,000 and 17,000 years ago.

Japanese citizens are already buying up all of Cayce’s books.  In Japan, he is considered a big prophet than Nostradamus.

LEBANON, KY -  A man shot and killed a chupacabra in Kentucky!

A man in Lebanon Junction, Ky., spotted a chupacabra on his property and shot it dead.

Local politicians believe that the chupacabra was released into Kentucky by the Obama Administration because they are not happy with the Republican-leaning citizens of the Bluegrass State.

Robert Gibbs, White House Press Secretary, however, denied that allegation.  “We have not released any beasts into any state at any time.”  Gibbs added with a smile, “though if Sarah Palin ever sees Big Foot, we might have something to do with that.”

Pressed about whether he knew about any chupacabras running wild in Kentucky, Gibbs said, ” There is no concrete evidence that chupacabras exist, anywhere.”

Hmmm… That’s strange.  WWN had a report this summer about The Obama Administration releasing several chupacabras into Arizona after they passed their immigration law.  The release of chupcabras was confirmed by multiple reports by authorities in Arizona.  Read the full WWN report on this event.

In Kentucky, Mark Cothren said he shot down the animal with whiskers and big ears and denies that it was a house cat – as some people call it.  He also rejects comments from some neighbors speculating that was a coyote or a hairless rat.  “It’s a chupacabra.  No doubt about it,” said Cothren.

Researchers at the University of Louisville confirmed that the animal was, in fact, a chupacabra. Lebanon Police Chief also confirmed that it was a chupacabra.  “I don’t know what a chupacabra is, but I know all the animals that roam these parts and that thing, well I ain’t never seen nothing like it before. So, if Mark says it’s a chupacabra, then I say it’s a chupacabra.”

Professor Anna Pfeffer, of the University of Illinois, a specialist in chupacabras and a MacArthur Grant winner for her work with beasts and harpies, flew into Kentucky to examine the carcass.  “It’s definitely a male chupacabra. I’m 100% sure.  I’ve shot twenty or thirty of them myself, even choked some to death with my own bare hands.  They can be vicious and extremely dangerous.  I think Mr. Cothren did a remarkable job of slaying the beast.”

Professor Pfeffer wanted to take the dead beast back with her to Illinois, but Cothren wouldn’t let her.  “I plan on grilling that goat sucker as soon as I can,” Cothren said.

Cothren  invited the media to view the body of the goat sucker (as it’s called in some countries).  The beast was prowling his property looking for something to kill and eat.

Here’s a YouTube video Mr. Cothren made about his kill:

KENTUCKY -  Anticipating another “biblical” flood, Kentucky is building an ark for some of its elite citizens.

Under the guise of building a “tourist attraction”, the state of Kentucky is preparing for a biblical flood, which state lawmakers anticipate happening by June of 2011.

The state has promised generous tax incentives to a group of entrepreneurs who plan to construct a full-size replica of Noah’s ark, load it with animals and the elite members of Kentucky society.

Since Gov. Steven L. Beshear announced the plan on Wednesday, some constitutional experts have raised alarms over whether government backing for an enterprise that promotes religion violates the First Amendment’s requirement of separation of church and state. But Mr. Beshear, a Democrat, said the arrangement posed no constitutional problem, and brushed off questions about his stand on creationism.

“The people of Kentucky didn’t elect me governor to debate religion,” he said at a news conference. “They elected me governor to create jobs and to protect them from biblical earthquakes, hurricanes and floods.”

The so-called “theme park” was orginally conceived by the same Christian ministry that built the Creation Museum in Petersburg, Ky., where dioramas designed to debunk evolution show humans and dinosaurs coexisting peacefully on an earth created by God in six days. The ministry, Answers in Genesis, believes that the earth is only 6,000 years old — a controversial assertion even among many Bible-believing Christians.

Although the Creation Museum has been a target of ridicule by some, it has drawn 1.2 million visitors in its first three years — proving that there is a sizable paying audience for entertainment rooted in a literal interpretation of the Bible.

The audience may be too big.  “As soon as word gets out that we have the only ark in America and… when everyone realizes that the second flood is coming… we are going to have a real security problem on our hands,” said Governor Beshar.  “I’ve already put in a preliminary notice to the National Guard to protect the ark.  We only have room for so many people and… the animals.”

The ark is to be built with wooden pegs and timber framing by Amish builders. Animals including giraffes will be kept in pens on board.  The Governor has selected the animals that he wants on the ark.  “I don’t want any cats.  I don’t think there is a place for cats in the new world,” said Governor Beshar.

Kentucky will be using Federal stimulus money to fund the ark.  “Finally, there is a good use of government tax dollars,” said Senate-Elect Rand Paul of Kentucky.

FAIRDALE, KY – A Kentucky man believes he has photos of a Bigfoot in his backyard!

Kevin Mahoney set up a motion-sensitive camera in his backyard, to take photos of any passing wildlife. Mahoney checked the camera last week, expecting to see squirrels and rabbits, but found something much stranger.

Mahoney said, “It looked like it had the outline of a head, and, like, gorilla-type shoulders, and then the arms crossed is what it looks like to me.”

Unlike most Bigfoot sightings, Mahoney does not believe it is the mythic creature. But he doesn’t believe it’s a bear either. His wife took the photo to a black bear expert, who said that she couldn’t confirm or deny that it was a bear. But she did say it is definitely a fur-covered animal.

What do you think it is?

I’m madder than a hillbilly with a busted banjo string because Obama isn’t helping those poor folks in Kentucky!

Seems they had a big ice storm and dozens of people are dead. More than a million homes haven’t got electricity. It’s a state of emergency but the funny thing is: I don’t see the midstream media filming folks looting plasma TVs or huddled together at Churchill Downs, yelling about cannibalism, or shooting the National Guard from the roofs of their hillbilly shacks.

I guess because none of that’s going on! All those crazy stupid hicks are just taking care of themselves and their neighbors, and clinging to their guns and bibles and Klan robes and moonshine to keep warm like they have for countless inbred generations.

But what’s our new Communist-in-Chief doing? Chowing down on arugula steaks at that fancy pants Buckwheat Dinner, then watching the Super Bowl in his toasty warm office. (Guess you heard that the same guy who told us “we can’t keep our homes on 72 degrees at all times” insists his Oval Office be kept hotter than an orchid greenhouse because “he’s from Hawaii.”)

Obama doesn’t want to make a fuss about the Kentucky ice storm, and not just because those hillbillies didn’t vote for him. It’s because if he does, his whole global warming scam goes right out the single-pane window! Boy, does Obama have slush on his face now!

The Teleprompter Kid better fly his magic unicorn over the rainbow and down to Kentucky pronto if he wants to keep that Spike Jones fella from making a nasty movie called “When the Generators Broke”. Obama said he’d stop the oceans from rising but he can’t melt a little snow?

That Obama! I tell you – he sure puts the “F” in FEMA!

CARTER COUNTY, KY – Bat Boy was spotted joining in on a bat swarm in an effort to meet girls.

There comes a time in every little bat boy’s life when girls stop being gross and start being intriguing. After being turned down by his first love Meghan McCain, it appears that Bat Boy is on a mission to understand the opposite sex.

He recently visited the Bat Cave State Nature Preserve in Kentucky to join in on a bat swarm, a type of mating ritual for bats. But his efforts were to no avail; Bat Boy was left standing on the ground, flowers in hand, as the bats swooped and chirped far out of his reach. He was of no interest to these ladies of the night.

After being rejected by both human and bat females, will Bat Boy ever find The One?

Bat Boy was spotted last night in Louisville, Kentucky, taking in a Vampire Weekend performance!

Concertgoers are reporting that he slipped past security using a disguise, consisting of skinny jeans and an  “Ithaca is Gorges” t-shirt.

Bat Boy squeaked and squealed along to Vampire Weekend’s Upper West Side Soweto beats. After the show, he snuck backstage and showed his appreciation to the band by bringing them mosquitoes to devour.