NEW YORK – You like leather ladies? Well, the hottest gigolo in town is waiting for you to ring his cowbell.

He’s back in New York City for one month only and he’s aiming to please. Cowboy, whose real name is Buck, has a bovine head and a smoking hot male body. He’s known as the greatest male prostitute to ever work in New York City. No more waiting, Ladies… the Cowboy has come home.

Buck is technically a bull (an uncastrated adult male) not a cow, but he didn’t like it when people called him Bullboy.

Buck originally hails from Crystal Lake, Illinois and grew up on The Scott Ranch, well-known cattle breeders.  The owner, Spike Scott, often experimented with cross-breeding. In 1970, Spike bought a dairy cow named Betsy and thought there was something special about her. He decided to mix his own “DNA” with Betsy’s and… Buck was born!

He attended schools in Crystal Lake, but was kicked out of high school for eating the school lawn.

Buck was popular with everybody in Crystal Lake, especially the girls. They loved the fact that the only word he could say was “moo.”  But Buck still felt like an outsider and decided to mosey to New York City where he knew he wouldn’t stick out.

Unfortunately, the first person Buck met was an imp named Ratso, who quickly took advantage of  Buck’s popularity with women. The imp became Buck’s pimp and…the rest is history. Buck became known as The Midnight Cowboy and always had a herd of women waiting to see him. “He’s got a great nose and great skin,” said Morgan Larkin, 35.  “But what really turns me on is the fact that he’s a great listener. I can talk for hours and he doesn’t even blink.”

“The only thing that bothers me about Buck is that he chews my plants,” said regular client, Sandy Nixon. “But he’s a great cuddler and nobody nuzzles like Buck. Nobody!”  Buck usually has to drink a bathtub of water on every “call” but women don’t mind because, as one longtime client said, “he’s hung like a bull.”

Buck finally got away from Ratso in 1995 and has been living on a dairy farm in Sweden ever since. He’s been divorced three times – he married a woman, a heifer, and a woman heifer.  Before coming back to America, Buck stopped in Pamplona for the running of the bulls.  He was running with the bulls and from the bulls.

Ladies of New York… if you want an appointment with The Midnight Cowboy, email Frank Lake at WWN.  He won’t steer you wrong.

In a speech at a Republican fundraising event, Jon Voight decried Barack Obama as a false prophet.  He then declared himself the new savior of America.

At Monday night’s fundraising dinner for the Republican Party, Jon Voight was the special guest speaker.  In his address he decried Barack Obama as a false prophet who was gleefully leading the country towards Marxism.  He then anointed himself the true savior, who would lead America towards righteous free-market capitalism.

Voight defended his false prophet claims, saying, “Everything Obama has recommended has turned out to be disastrous,” referring to Obama’s stance on the economy, Iraq, and support of Adam Lambert on American Idol.  He then challenged the President to a duel on top of Mount Rushmore “where God will see fit to grant victory to his true chosen one.”  Whether the opponents will duel with pistols or by turning their staffs into snakes is still unclear, but will be televised if Obama accepts.

Nearly 5,000 people were fed at the Republican fundraiser, dining on smoked salmon and olive focaccia.  Those seated closest noticed during his speech that somehow his glass of water had changed to top shelf vodka.  After his speech, Voight took turns laying hands on attendees, calling on the ghost of Reagan to watch over them and blessing them with “Lax gun laws,” “Rush-like Wit,” and “a convenient absence of the Gay.”

Voight is already embroiled in legal trouble with the IRS regarding donations to his new church.