The Obama Administration is reportedly asking Americans to send their resumes to the White House.

WASHINGTON – President Obama announced yesterday that he is canceling the midterm elections, due to the jobs crisis.

MEXICO CITY – Americans, in the hundreds of thousands, are crossing the border into Mexico -looking for work.

DALLAS – According to sources close to the Texas governor – Rick Perry fakes his twang.

WASHINGTON – Lindsay Lohan has been called to testify before a House panel on a new Jobs bill.

DETROIT – Out-of-work Americans are signing up in record numbers for a new union, the Union of Unemployed Americans.

That Obama really smashes my atoms!