WASHINGTON – Obama is shaking up his White House staff and wants an “Alice In Wonderland” theme for his re-election year.

WASHINGTON, DC – The White House has officially renamed the U.S. Government of the U.S. Federal Family.

BLACK ROCK CITY – The Obamas are going to Burning Man to celebrate the President’s 50th Birthday and extend their vacation.

WASHINGTON, DC – The Super Congress met in secret last night. Word leaked that they will make the stock market rise and heal the earth!

WASHINGTON, DC – Nancy Pelosi went on all the news shows to make a proclamation: the world will end on August 2nd!

CAMBRIDGE – A groundbreaking study has determined that 83% of the members of Congress are certified morons!

VANCOUVER – An Asian man tried to sneak into Canada dressed as an old white man.

CHICAGO – Every state is reporting massive voter fraud in today’s midterm elections.

LAS VEGAS – Early voting has assured victory for Harry Reid in next week’s midterm elections.

COPIAPO, CHILE – In an agreement between the U.S. and Chile — for each miner brought up, they will send down one U.S. politician.