WASHINGTON, DC – Congress will vote next month on a bill to legalize marijuana.

WASHINGTON – The Obama Administration confirmed tonight that Osama Bin Laden is in the C.I.A.

CRAWFORD, TX – George W. Bush shocked his family, friends and the nation by announcing today that he is gay.

HADES – The Devil, overwhelmed by people selling their souls, is putting a temporary freeze on soul purchases.

Rhinebeck, NY – Bill Clinton threw a wild bachelor party last night for his future son-in-law, Marc Mezvinsky. Chelsea Clinton wasn’t happy.

WWN EXCLUSIVE – Bat Boy, Bigfoot, and Bush are all on the guest list for Chelsea Clinton’s wedding in Rhinebeck, New York on July 31

VANCOUVER – At a Canadian luncheon last week, former President Bush said, “I did not sell my soul.” Satan has disputed his statement.

Can you believe it? Good old George W. Bush just raised $100-million for his Presidential library in only 100 days! So much for the crappy economy!

WASHINGTON, DC – A federal judge has ordered the emails of the Bush administration be surrendered to the courts, and Weekly World News has some!

WASHINGTON, DC – President Bush’s unlucky week continued as another shoe wielding reporter attacked him at an intergalactic press junket.