NEW YORK — First lady Michelle Obama will play in the women’s final at the U.S.  Open.

Michelle Obama stopped by the U.S Open yesterday and wowed the spectators with her fierce play.   She played against Serena Williams, clocked a 105-mph serve .

U.S. Open officials – at the request of The White House – have put Michelle Obama in the semi-finals against Caroline Wozniacki.  The White House and Michelle Obama are confident she can win her first U.S. Open title – and her first tennis match – ever.

Before her match, Obama spoke to a group of local youngsters as part of her campaign against childhood obesity.

“I know I have a talent for tennis, but I wanted to be a lawyer instead,” she said. “But you don’t have to be as good as me to enjoy it.”

Obama then went on the court and in played what was first scheduled to be a “friendly game” against Serena Williams.

“The First Lady game to play,” said Williams.  ”I was hitting it gently to her and she was slamming them back at me.  I started playing for real and – she kicked my butt.”

Obama will be the first First Lady to appear in a U.S. Open Final.

“I’ve been trying to get to the U.S. Open my entire life,” Obama said.

She later took in the men’s quarterfinal matches at Arthur Ashe Stadium. Joined by former and current players Billie Jean King, James Blake and Katrina Adams, Obama recalled that she didn’t get into tennis until after law school because there were few courts where she grew up on the South Side of Chicago. Obama praised the U.S. Tennis Association’s efforts to build kid-sized courts around the country and recruit more youngsters to the game.

Now she hopes she and her daughters will still be playing when they’re in their 90s.

“It’s a sport you can do forever,” Obama said.  ”I love it.”

Does Obama think she can defeat Wozniacki.  ”It won’t even be close,” the First Lady said.

WASHINGTON, DC – First Lady Michelle Obama is going ahead with plans to change the color of the White House for the first time in history – by painting it green!

The scheme might sound like a joke, but insiders insist it’s all too true.

According to those sources, Mrs. Obama believes that the change of color will reflect the new tone of President Barack Obama’s administration of energy and environmental conservation.

“Mrs. Obama is intent on creating a diversion to take the focus of the financial crisis off the President and painting the White House green certainly seems to fit the bill,” said one source with close ties to the Oval Office.

“Not so apparent, but equally important, is what the First Lady herself has to gain from it. If she can change the color of the White House – which is the oldest pubic building in Washington and has been home to every president since John Adams in 1800 – she can do anything. And if the public believes she can do anything, her chances of becoming America’s first female president in the future will increase dramatically.

“That possibility has factored heavily in her decision to make an issue of the color of the White House. And because she knows that her plans will be thwarted if she makes them public prematurely, she intends to put the project in motion behind the scenes. By the time the media and public find out, it will be too late to do anything about it. The White House will be green. Mrs. Obama wil take the credit. And when the furor dies down, she will be remembered as the woman who changed one of the most important and revered symbols in our nation’s history.”

Mrs. Obama bristled but managed to maintain her silence when queried about the allegations. Not surprisingly, White House spokesmen followed her lead, declining to comment on the report in any form whatsoever.

“Official silence is expected but it’s an odds-on bet that the White House will soon be known as the Green House,” said the source. “The only thing holding Mrs. Obama back at this point is the choice of shade. From what I understand, she is torn between grass green and hunter green. When she decides, painters will show up at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue with brushes, ladders and scaffolds and start painting.”

President Obama’s response to the plan is not known. In fact, he might not even know about it, sources say. “Mr. Obama gives his wife a free reign so it’s doubtful that he will stand in her way,” one insider said.

WASHINGTON, DC – Obama made history yesterday by holding a national online town hall. Unfortunately the tech savvy president still forgot to turn off the webcam when he was done.

Taking questions on a large variety of topics, Obama spoke directly to the people on Thursday from the comfort of the White House.  Critics laud his attempts at making government accessible, and getting people involved.

For several hours after the town hall the webcam was left on, recording various candid moments of the president in his home.

Several times President Obama is seen walking by the camera wearing boxer shorts and an undershirt while preparing what appeared to be a pot of macaroni and cheese.  He and his wife can be seen discussing economic policy while the President eats directly from the pot using a large wooden spoon.

Earlier in the evening President Obama sang along to a Joni Mitchell best of album, and rocked his youngest Sasha to sleep singing “Stay” by Lisa Loeb.

After talking with Rahm Emanuel about House Republicans, Obama went on a seven minute rant angrily venting his frustrations before calmly calling back and discussing the problem constructively.

During the evening, the president also quoted lines from several Samuel L. Jackson movies.

Borrowing a pair of sunglasses he stood next to a white Secret Service agent and proceeded to quote several lines from the movie Pulp Fiction.  The agent did not say anything, but Obama went through entire scenes from the movie.  Later he quoted the infamous bible verse, still wearing sunglasses boxers and an undershirt, standing on a sofa and brandishing a Nerf dart gun.

Towards the end of the video, the President can be seen on the couch studying economic policy while his wife does roughly 200 push ups.  She then asks the president if the White House has a vet.

“No, why?”

“’Cause these pythons are sick!” said the First Lady while flexing.

Eventually one of the administration’s top technical advisors ran into the room and hurriedly turned off the webcam.

The White House has released no official statement yet but word is expected at some point later today.