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FLYING SEMIS – (VIDEO)
DALLAS — Tornadoes tore through the Dallas area, tearing roofs off homes, tossing trucks into the air and leaving flattened tractor trailers strewn along highways and parking lots.
JACKIE KENNEDY: LYNDON JOHNSON GOT BOBBY, TOO!
NEW YORK – Sources say tapes released reveal that Jackie Kennedy believed Lyndon Johnson was also the mastermind behind RFK’s assassination.
JACKIE KENNEDY: LYNDON JOHNSON KILLED JFK
NEW YORK – Tapes released by Caroline Kennedy reveal that Jackie Kennedy believed Lyndon B Johnson was the mastermind behind JFK’s assassination.
HEAT FANS PUT VOODOO CURSE ON MAVS
MIAMI – Miami Heat fans buying up voodoo dolls by the thousands to curse the Mavs.
JFK KILLED OVER UFOS!
WASHINGTON – Secret CIA memos reveal that President John F. Kennedy was killed because he wanted to release the UFO files.
STUDY: WATCHING SUPER BOWL CAUSES IMPOTENCE
A new study conducted by researchers at the University of Pennsylvania found that watching the Super Bowl causes male impotence!
PINK HIPPO: DEAD IN DALLAS
DALLAS – A rare pink hippo, spotted on a farm outside Dallas, was soon shot dead by a local rancher.
STEVIE RAY VAUGHAN SEEN AT THE CROSSROADS
MISSISSIPPI DELTA – On the 20th anniversary of his death, Stevie Ray Vaughan was seen at the Crossroads. He can still play that guitar!
MCCAIN-BORG UPGRADES FOR DEBATE
DALLAS, TX – Republican presidential nominee John McCain announced Monday he will suspend his campaign yet again in order to upgrade his cybernetic systems. Sources say he hopes to appear more passably human before the final debate.
